One Month Healthy
by skystar234
Summary: The last time Emma trusted a group, they filed her under 'walker fodder'. So when she meets up with a group of survivors from Atlanta, all she wants to do is get what she needs and get away. Too bad that it's never quite as simple as all that. [Rick/OC] While I do love Daryl, he gets the majority of the stories. I'll get to him some other time, but I'm giving Rick a shot now.
1. Chapter 1

**Author****'****s Note/Disclaimer: **I do not own The Walking Dead, and I actually don't even own Crawford. For those of you who've played The Walking Dead Game, you'll know about it. I thought it would be fun to bring it into the regular series, so it may pop up again later (or one of the characters from the game, I haven't decided yet). In light of The Walking Dead starting up again, I've decided to start putting this story out there along with my other one, so let me know how I'm doing! I'll do my best to update decently.

**Chapter 1:**

Of all the decisions that Emma had made in her life, moving to Savannah Georgia had to be the dumbest one. Quickly followed by her decision to steal a car in the lot with no air conditioning. The heat- or, more specifically, the humidity- was killer.

Of course, that wasn't the only killer roaming these days…

Emma shook herself. 'No need to think about the fact that people are starting to come back from the dead to eat each other,' she thought furiously. 'Or…that place. Just focus on surviving.'

Right now, surviving meant water. Just because she could practically drink the air did not mean she wasn't going to get dehydrated eventually.

Emma had run in to car trouble after a few hours from Savannah, and so had to store the gas she'd had for three days before finding a workable car. The second car had a map in the passenger side door. Consulting it, Emma realized that she was pretty near Atlanta by now. She also realized that just outside of Atlanta by now. She also realized that just outside of Atlanta there was an abandoned quarry, which, theoretically, would have plenty of water. She looked at the empty jug gallons in the back seat, the prickle in her throat becoming more pronounced.

"Guess I'm going to Atlanta." She said dryly, pulling to the proper turn off.

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As Emma drop up through the hills towards her water source, she actually missed the turn off trying to remember how long you had to boil water before it was drinkable. 'Was it 30 minutes… I think it was 30 minutes…' She thought, absently passing the turn and going straight.

She did have a kettle in the back, and some matches. With all these trees around she could find some wood to burn…or maybe she could ask those people over there if they had any…oh shit.

She stopped the car slowly, making sure she had her gun on her hip. She hadn't come across any living people since she'd left, and she couldn't be sure they'd be friendly. Especially when two or three of them were already pointing guns at her.

"Crap." Emma muttered, sighing at the number of cars and people. "Should've payed attention." She turned off the engine and cracked the window.

"You going to shoot if I step out?" She called to the group.

There was a pause before one called back. "Only if you do."

Fair's fair, she supposed. She shrugged and slowly got out of the car, hands slightly raised. She knew that they would be able to see her gun, but she wasn't about to go out without it!

There were three guys in the front holding guns- one Hispanic, one with curly black hair and combat boots, and one with short brown hair in jeans. What surprised Emma was the group of people behind them- some men, some women, an older guy, even a couple of kids.

At once Emma relaxed a little. 'They have kids,' She thought to herself. 'They're not the same as…them.'

The man in the combat boots stepped forward, almost aggressively. "How'd you get up here?" He demanded.

Emma shrugged. "Used a map. Saw there was an old quarry around here and figured I could get some water." She eyed a few water jugs in the back of a Jeep parked behind the group. "But I guess that you guys control that?"

"Our camp uses it," The man with the brown hair clarified. He looked just as tense as the others, as well as comfortable with his weapon as the first guy who'd spoken. But this one seemed much less aggressive. Emma decided to try her luck with him.

"I'm really sorry to have bothered you," She said sincerely, directly to him rather than the three. "I just came for some water. I can get some and be on my way."

The two men glanced at each other. "You alone?" The first one asked.

Emma nodded. "I used to be with people. Didn't work out." She shrugged. "I've only been on my own for a few days."

The guns lowered slightly, but the combat boots still looked suspicious. "Who were you with?" He fired at her. "And why did you leave?" Immediately Emma stiffened.

Both the Hispanic and Jeans looked at the guy sharply. "Shane, that's not our business," Jean guy said, which Emma appreciated.

"The hell its not, Rick! No one just wanders away from a group voluntarily. We need to think about who this woman is and who she may be leading up here!" The combat boots guy- Shane- retorted.

Emma stepped forward, making the guns jerk up again. "Who I am is Emma Conway," She said carefully, raising her hands. "I moved to Savannah two years ago from New Hampshire. No one-" She emphasized this strongly- "No one is looking for me or following me. I'm just trying to survive like the rest of you."

There was another pause filled with tension, but Jeans Guy closed the gap between them and held out a hand to shake. "I'm Rick Grimes." He offered. "That's Shane Walsh and Morales." Morales nodded at her and she returned the gesture. Shane just grunted.

"I'm sorry about that," Rick said, and Emma smiled a little.

"No worries. You're protecting your camp. I just didn't realize I was so threatening," she joked.

More people from the camp started coming closer, like deer scared of a gunshot. There were a couple of blonde girls, a young Asian guy, a brunette woman with her hand on the shoulder of a little boy, another woman with a little girl, and the older man with a fishing hat.

Emma waved awkwardly at the before shoving her hands into her back pockets.

"There are other people out there?" One of the blonde girls asked, sort of excited. "More groups like us?"

Emma hesitated. "I'm sure there are," She said neutrally.

"You said you were with other people," Shane said, narrowing his eyes.

Emma sighed. "I was, but they were nothing like you." She said, almost tired. "They aren't a group you want to hook up with."

"Can you tell us anything?" Rick prodded a little. "Anything at all? We might run into these guys at some point."

"You won't." Emma said with certainty. "They're all shacked up in Savannah, it's highly doubtful they'll wander off. Unless the apocalypse happens again."

That explanation didn't seem to do much to settle the crowd. Emma knew that explaining wasn't really a big deal in the grand scheme of things, and Rick had a point when he said that they might run into them. They needed to know what some people were capable of. There was just one small part of her that wanted to keep those secrets buried.

"It's called Crawford." She said reluctantly. Everyone perked up, seeing she was finally spilling about other survivors.

"After everything started going to hell, one neighborhood in Savannah blocked itself off from everything else. Started forming their own little Utopia- scavenged food, guns, gas, anything that might be useful. While the rest of the world around them went to shit, they survived. If you lived there, you had guards, a place to stay, food and water." She took a breath. "On the face of it, Crawford was a paradise."

"Then the rules started coming down on us."

Emma leaned against the hood of her car, pulling her hair into a ponytail- a nervous habit she'd picked up years ago.

"Crawford wanted to make sure it survived. To do that, they decided to start cutting out weaknesses. They started weeding out people that they thought couldn't pull their own weight. Anyone who was old, or sick and required special care, any…" She looked at the little girl and boy sadly, "…any children, they all were ruled as a waste of precious resources. And Crawford couldn't afford to waste resources."

There was a long silence. Emma saw both mothers clutch their children closer. The older man ran a hand over his face. Shane and Rick both looked sick.

"They…they _killed_ them?" The Asian kid asked. "All of them?"

Emma smiled wryly. "The old and sick. They started rounding them up like cattle and leading them off to be killed." She left out the fact that they were killed inside the hospital. She left out that Crawford stacked the bodies around their 'borders' to warn people away.

"The children were just kicked out, with their parents, and left to fend for themselves."

After she finished, everyone just looked shell-shocked. They had always thought the danger came from the Walkers, but apparently the living could be just as deadly.

"That's why you left?" Rick finallya sled. Emma knew it was coming, and really at this point, there was no reason to lie. The more you lied, the easier it was to get tangled up in what you told people, and the more likely you were to lose their trust anyways.

"Mostly. But I know if I hadn't, they'd have come for me sooner or later." She crossed her arms. "When I was in college, I was diagnosed with lupus; it's an auto-immune thing. It's not going to kill me or anything, but it affects my joints and sometimes makes me slow down. Under Crawford's list of what was and wasn't allowed, I was under the 'walker fodder' category."

No one seemed to know what to say to that, and Emma didn't really need them too. She'd had lupus long enough that it didn't really phase her anymore. They wanted honesty and she'd given it to them.

"So that's why I'm alone." She said, shrugging. "Been that way for almost a week and I've survived. So really when I tell you I stumbled here by accident, I mean it. And when I tell you that I don't anything other than water, I mean it."

Rick stepped forward with a sympathetic look on his face. "We believe you," He said softly, though Emma could tell that didn't apply to the whole group. Plenty were still eyeing her suspiciously. "You know, our camp is pretty secure, and we could always use more hands-"

"Woah woah woah, Rick!" Shane burst out, grabbing the other man's shoulder. "You hear one little sob story and you're just going to let her right in?"

Both Rick and Emma bristled. "What are you suggesting, that we just throw her back out there?" Rick asked, voice hard.

"Look man, we don't know anything about this chick except the sob story she just told us. For all we know, she was part of that town and she left anyway!" Shane argued. "We've got to think about the mouths we have to feed already! How do we know what good she'd even be?"

"Excuse me." The words were quiet, but the venom behind them was overwhelming. "SHE is right here, and SHE can hear every word you're saying!" Emma hated being treated like a special case, but she hated more when people acted as though she was using her "special case" to her advantage. She did have some self-respect.

Shane just rolled his eyes. "You want a prize for that or something, princess?"

"Look, I didn't come here to join up with another group!" Emma snapped. "I just want to get some water and I'll be out of your hair! I'll even trade you for it, if that makes you feel any better."

Rick moved like he was going to protest, but Shane stopped him. "Trade what?"

Emma did a quick mental inventory. "I've scavenged a lot of medicine along the way here- antibiotics, pain meds, that sort of thing. I can give you a couple of boxes for a couple of hours to get water."

Seeing that Shane was not backing down, Rick could only sigh. "That sounds like a fair arrangement," He said.

Emma retreated into her car and pulled out a couple of boxes of cold medicine, antibiotics and pain meds. She also threw in a bottle of Aloe, knowing that a sunburn now would be a pretty big pain that no one needed. She jumped out of the car, walked up to Rick and started handing him items. Shane seemed like he was more in charge, but he was a jerk and Rick seemed like a reasonable person. She actually respected him.

"I'm sorry about this," He said as he took the medicine. "I can talk to Shane, you shouldn't have to go-"

"It's fine." Emma said shortly. "I wasn't coming to find a new group. I just wanted some time to get some water."

She kind of felt bad for snapping at him, but she had just told a group of strangers her weakness, and she was getting kicked out without ever being let in. She really didn't owe them anything.

Right now, she just wanted water.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note/ Disclaimer: **I do not own The Walking Dead. It would be fantastic, but if I did own them I probably wouldn't let anyone die and then it wouldn't be as good a show. I own the seasons that are available to own, so I am going to do my absolute best to stay as close to the actual script as I can (I know how much it annoys me when the wording is a little off) but I will not only be using show script. There is a difference, however subtle. So feel free to drop me a review or PM me if there's anything you want to tell me! And thank you to Panda Bandit for my first review on this story, you guys have no idea how happy reviews make me!

**Chapter Two: **

The group started to disperse after Emma handed over the medicine. Shane gave most of it to the older man, whose name was Dale and apparently who owned an RV where the group stored stuff. Before leaving, Shane allotted Emma three hours to go down to the quarry and get some water.

She was still a little irked by the way she'd been treated. Sure, she hadn't expected to be welcomed with open arms, but she had been rebuffed with so much force you'd have thought she'd been part walker.

As she got a fire going, Emma tried her best to calm down. These people had to look after their own, and it was a good thing to do. She didn't need to be back in a group anyway- not after last time.

It took about a half an hour before the fire was warm enough to boil anything, and by the time Emma had boiled her first two pots the group was coming down to do their chores. A group of women sat at the base of the road doing the camp's laundry, making Emma scoff. Back to the Middle Ages, weren't they?

They kept glancing towards her, as if they thought she might jump like a violent animal any minute. Emma just waved at them and kept checking the water for bubbles.

"Hi." A shy voice came from behind Emma made her jump and put a hand on her waist. She whirled to see the little boy from before blinking at her innocently.

"Jeez kid," She sighed, allowing her hand to relax. "Give a girl some warning. I could've thought you were a walker."

The boy tilted his head a little. "Sorry. But Shane says that walkers don't talk." He fidgeted a little bit. "My name's Carl."

Emma softened a bit. "Hi Carl. My name is Emma." She glanced over at the group of women, looking for the brunette that she assumed was his mother. "What are you doing out of camp?"

It was a legitimate question. This kid was only eleven or twelve, and Emma would bet her life that he hadn't made it this long because he knew how to protect himself.

"Shane said he's going to teach me how to catch frogs!" Carl said brightly, staring into her pot. "What are you doing?"

"I'm boiling water to drink," Emma said, getting one of her jugs ready. "There's no point in drinking something that's going to make you sick." She highly doubted that there were actually any frogs in this quarry, but she supposed they had to give Carl something to do.

"Dad said we should have let you stay," Carl said, making Emma glance up. That ruled Shane out as his Dad then. Rick maybe? "He said that Shane didn't need to be judging you."

Emma smiled wryly. "Shane isn't the first person to do that, kid. But thank your dad for sticking up for me. He didn't have to."

She continued to watch the water in silence, but she could tell that Carl was squirming to talk. "How can you tell when the water's done?" He asked, glancing into the pot.

Even before the world had ended, Emma hadn't had much experience with kids. The only time she'd tried to babysit a neighbor's kid, the baby girl had cried for her mother until she got tired and fell asleep, no matter what Emma had tried. To say that she wasn't a little intimidated by this kid's interest in her would be a lie.

"Usually I wait a half hour, to be on the safe side," She said, poking her stick into the fire. "It doesn't get rid of any chemicals or anything- I'd need a special filter for that- but this kills the bacteria. I'm sure you do this in your camp."

"Yeah, but no one explains it." Carl said, plopping down next to her. "They're all busy with chores. Sophia and I just do schoolwork and don't learn about camp stuff."

As important as learning to survive was, Emma was impressed that the camp was still trying to make things normal for the kids. It was just so…human.

"Carl! What are you doing over there?" The army boots stomping towards the two of them didn't bode well, and as Emma looked up, neither did that face. "You shouldn't be over here on your own!"

He threw Emma a dirty look that made her bristle. "I wasn't going to cook him and eat him," She muttered.

Shane narrowed his eyes. "Why are you even still here? We told you that you couldn't join us- hanging around isn't going to change our minds."

Emma snorted. "Believe me, I don't need you to change your minds. Based on the level of welcome I'e received thus far, I want to get enough water to get as far away as possible," She snarked.

Shane crossed his arms. He looked like he was about to say something else, probably even less complimentary than before, but they both glanced at Carl. The boy was looking at them worriedly.

"Just get going when you're done." Shane muttered before steering Carl away towards the water so they could go 'catch frogs'. Carl glanced back over his shoulder and waved, and Emma waved back at him with a small smile.

'Cute kid,' She thought to herself absently as she started pouring the cleaner water into a jug. Only another hour or so…

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Emma was just finishing up with her last bucket of water when Carl's mother went stomping by her to Shane and Carl. Shane had made sure to put himself in a position where he could keep an eye on Emma during the 'frog-catching' which, quite frankly, had been pretty annoying.

"Carl. What did I tell you about leaving Dale's sight?" Her voice was tight, and Emma couldn't help but wonder what the problem was. Shane was a jackass to her sure, but he clearly cared about Carl and she didn't fancy a walker's chances against him.

"But Shane said we could-"

"It doesn't matter what Shane says, it matters what I say. Go on. Back to camp. I'm right behind you." 

Carl's face fell and he trudged past Emma to head back up the hill. Emma felt bad for him, because he'd been enjoying himself, which probably didn't happen all that much anymore.

Emma also know that whatever happened next was not only none of her business, but something she didn't want to hear, so she ducked her head and tried to pack up her stuff as quickly as she could. Unfortunately, she wasn't deaf.

"I gotta tell ya, I do not think you should be taking this out on him," Shane said lowly. He and Carl's mother were slightly hidden behind the rocks, so Emma couldn't see them, but she could sense the tension all the way over by her little fire.

"You don't tell me what to do, you lost that privilege."

Ouch.

"Lori…could you just, just wait up for a second? I think we should talk-"

"No, that's over too. You can tell that to the frogs."

Emma could tell this was about really awkward really fast, so she started scrambling to pack up and get the hell out of there. She didn't know what sort of dysfunction this group had and she didn't want to. Some of the wood she collected started hitting her pot. Part of her hoped the noise would either cover up the conversation or alert Lori and Shane that someone else was around, but no such luck.

"-and you don't think I'm happy about that? He's my best friend!"

"Why would you be? You are the one who told me that he died!"

Emma didn't know exactly what she was hearing, but she knew it was time to go. As Lori stomped out from behind the rocks, she started securing her jugs of water in the backseat of her car.

Just as she secured the last one, shouting from farther down the bank alerted her to another issue in this group.

The woman she'd seen earlier with the little girl had just been hit across the face by a large man- one of the girls had pulled her away while the others started pushing him away, screaming at him. Emma put a hand on the handle of her knife, wondering what to do. This was not her group, she had no right to get involved. But…no asshole had the right to abuse any woman.

Before she could move more than an inch, Shane was stomping past her and pulling the man off the group of girls.

Before the beginning to beat his face in.

Immediately Emma was taken back to the screams that had come from the hospital late at night, the ones she'd tried to block out with a pillow over her head while knowing that she could be next. The ones from people taken to be exterminated.

'Not again,' she thought weakly, putting a hand on her car to steady herself. 'Not more turning.'

In the end, it wasn't turning into a walker that really scared Emma- it was the people turning on each other.

"Shane! Shane stop it!" The group of girls were screaming at him until he finally dropped the collar of the other man's shirt. The woman who'd been initially hit ran to his still body, sobbing apologies, as the other women stared at Shane in shock.

They began to carry the man back up to the camp, leaving Shane alone at the base of the road. He was breathing heavily as he stared at his hand, still clenched in a fist, dripping blood.

His head shot up so that he met Emma's horrified gaze, and the intensity in his eyes made Emma's blood run cold. The message was plenty clear.

_**Get. Out. **_


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note/ Disclaimer:** Happy Halloween everyone! What better way to celebrate than with a new chapter of a Walking Dead story?! What's everyone else dressing up as? For those of you who watch Supernatural, I'm going to be Bloody Mary from season 1. As per usual, I do not own The Walking Dead, sadly. Read and review, and many thanks to Panda Bandit and chibi-DJ-pon3 for their reviews on last week's chapter!

**Chapter Three: **

Emma took no time at all getting out of there- she didn't know Shane or what he was capable of but she'd seen that look in his eyes before. That much hate…directed towards anyone…it spelled out death.

She didn't want that look directed at her.

She drove back up to the camp to give them a cursory heads-up that she was leaving. Morales and Dale were the only ones there, said something about Rick leading a group out to recover a lost group member.

As Emma walked back to her car, Dale followed her. She slid into the front seat and he leaned on her window.

"You don't have to go, you know," He said, looking at her earnestly. "I'm sure once Rick gets back, he can talk Shane around into letting you stay, Shane listens to him most of the time. It's not right to just throw you back out there, not on your own."

Emma smiled at the older man gently. She got the feeling that he was sort of the group grandpa, always looking out for everyone else. It was nice to be worried about, but she'd been on her own for quite some time before the world had ended. She was used to it.

"It's fine, Dale." She said, smiling gently. "Like I said before, I wasn't looking to join up with anyone. I don't need to stay."

There was a pause as Emma looked at a map she had taped at the top of her windshield, trying to figure out the best backroads out of there.

"Where will you go?" Dale asked. "You said you were from New Hampshire, right?"

"Yeah, but that's a long way to go…especially when I'm pretty sure I'm not going to find anyone waiting there for me." There was another silence after that, but this one was long, awkward and sad.

"Thanks for everything," Emma said at least, shifting the car into gear. "I hope you guys do okay."

Dale waved as Emma drove off. She looked back at the camp in her rearview, sighing. At least four kids, some older folks. Sure, there were some people with survival experience, but there were some that were unstable. She could still feel Shane's hateful gaze on her.

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"You've got to be freaking kidding me." Emma groaned, smacking the front of her car in frustration as steam billowed out of the engine. Just as she had made the decision to leave the camp as far behind her as she could, of course her engine died. Her dad taught her how to change a tire, not how to fix a damn engine!

Emma pushed her hair out of her face and glanced at the horizon. She'd spent a lot of the day boiling water, and the sun was going to be completely down soon. She didn't like traveling after dark- the noise and lights drew walkers like flies and if she ran into a traffic snarl she was just boxing herself in.

She hadn't even gotten that far, she could still faintly hear the murmuring from the campsite. She supposed she'd have to walk all of her things out to the highway and find a new car tomorrow morning. Perhaps giving up some of those meds was going to be more helpful than she thought.

Emma slammed the hood down and curled up in the back seat of her car, settling in for the night. She pulled jackets and blankets over the windows, but kept one cracked open for air and to keep cool.

'Nothing I can do about it tonight,' She thought glumly. 'Might as well get some sleep.'

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Emma awoke with a jolt a few hours later with a start. For a moment, she wasn't even sure what had woken her up. She could hear crickets chirping and cicadas. She yawned and stretched, wanting to go back to sleep, but something was off…she couldn't imagine what it was, everything sounded-

Then she could hear it. Emma shot up in the seat, eyes wide. Coming from the campsite below her were horrified, gut-wrenching screams.

Emma grabbed her prized Winchester rifle in the front seat before scrambling out of the car and racing down the hall. The screaming and yelling just got louder and louder, making Emma's blood run cold.

Walkers were spilling into the camp, some had already begun tearing into camp members. One walker looked up at her from the still form of a girl that looked a little younger than Emma, mouth red with her blood and flesh stuck in its teeth. It opened its mouth to let out a snarl before Emma shot it in the forehead.

One of the blonde girls from before was hovering over the other one who was covered in blood. Dale and Morales were close to where Emma was, shooting and hitting walkers with a bat to keep them away.

Emma raised her rifle again and started firing, hitting most walkers square in the forehead, thanking her father silently for teaching her to shoot. She could see Shane trying to rally the survivors back towards the RV, Lori clinging to his shirt. But she couldn't see Carl…

Emma fired another couple of shots before seeing the boy, crying for his mother, scooting backwards on the ground from where he had tripped to get get away from the grabby, rotting hands. Emma raced forward and shot the one directly in front of his before pulling Carl to his feet. The boy wrapped his arms around her tightly as she continued shooting, backing up to try and get to the RV.

There were just so many of them…!

Emma had just run out of the ammo and switched to her handgun when more shots rang out from down the road. Rick and three other men were running towards them, all sporting weapons (several, actually) and all looking both exhausted and energized.

She took her eyes off the group to gun down three more walkers coming towards her and Carl. Carl buried his face in her stomach and, almost out of some basic instinct, Emma wrapped her free arm around his shoulders.

With the addition of the four men, the rest of the walkers fell quickly. Carl was still shaking, but he called out for his dad, making Rick run over to the pair of them. Carl immediately ran into his dad's arms, sobbing as Lori came running from behind Shane.

Rick looked up, meeting Emma's gaze. "Thank you." He said lowly, but the gratitude in his voice was unmistakable. "Thank you."

Emma nodded and stepped backwards, letting Rick lift Carl and go to Lori. The woman looked horrified and hugged Carl, assuring herself that he was still there.

Emma couldn't help but nothing, however, that Shane did not take his eyes off the family.

"I remember now," One of the men said, voice trembling, staring around at the bodies littering the ground of the campsite. "Why I dug the holes."

Only then, looking around at all the bodies, did Emma realize that she was shaking too.


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note/ Disclaimer: **I am so, so sorry for the wait! I always think that I'm going to get so much more done over break than I actually end up doing, and the finals before break were brutal…. But I promise, I'm going to do my absolute best to make sure there's never a huge gap like that again! I like to have one chapter written when I post so that I'll be a week early, so that way you don't have to wait like that again! Thank you for sticking with me! And thank you to RebornRose1992 and Jofrench22 for reviewing- Jofrench22, thank you for pointing out the part about Shane, I see your point, I was writing him as angry as I did because whenever he gets overlooked by Lori or put down when Rick's around, he does get really angry and lashes out (hence the beating of Ed), but perhaps he should have been a little less angry in the beginning. Also, thank you to the 20 people who've favorited this story and the 35 who follow it! You guys make me smile!

**Chapter Four:**

As the group and all its members- the survivors, anyway- started gathering together, Emma looked over the former camp, now littered with bodies. She could easily distinguish the walkers from those who'd been alive just a few hours ago- their blood was still bright red, splashed over the rocks and leaves on the ground. A walker's blood congealed and grew blacker the longer they were dead.

Her eyes fell on a young girl, probably not even out of her twenties, who was lying sprawled under two walkers. There were large chunks ripped from her arms and neck, the blood still shimmering in the glow of everyone's flashlights.

What really chilled Emma to the core was this poor girl's eyes. They were still open- dark blue, not unlike Emma's own, and terrified.

This girl had survived the beginning of the apocalypse, only to be chased out of her home, away from everything she knew and loved, and killed, alone and terrified. Without answers. Without hope.

Emma couldn't imagine anything worse.

"Excuse me? Miss?"

She was jolted out of her thoughts by Rick, who'd come up behind her with Shane and the little Asian boy.

"Emma." She said, not even attempting to force a smile. "You can just call me Emma."

Rick nodded. "I just wanted to thank you, again. You didn't have to come back and help us. My son is alive because of you." Shane shifted slightly behind Rick at this- Emma couldn't tell if it was from guilt or something else, something she didn't quite understand.

"I did, actually." Emma said, looking over at Carl and his mother, who were standing with the other kids from the camp and their parents. "If we can't help each other in times like this, how long can any of us expect to last?"

Rick nodded at that. "I still appreciate it." He looked around at the ruined camp, face falling. "I"m sorry that there isn't a lot to offer you right now…"

"Don't worry about it," Emma interrupted, waving her hand. "I'm parked up the road aways, so I can stick around and help you guys bury and burn, if you need the extra hands, and walk back when there's some sunlight."

Rick didn't even glance at the other two for a second opinion. "We'd really appreciate that," he said. Even Shane didn't object, and Emma realized that Rick was leading him now. He was in charge here.

"I'll help you," the Asian boy said, smiling weakly. "We're putting our people in a separate pile to bury."

Emma gave the boy a small smile and nodded. She figured it would be simple enough to tell former campers from walkers. Looking around at the group though, she wondered how they would deal with any members who turned. The blonde woman was still leaning over what Emma assumed was her sister, stroking her hair from her face lovingly.

Rick noticed where she was glancing and sighed. "We're taking care of it." He said, and Emma nodded slowly.

"I'll start moving bodies," she said, looking over her shoulder at the ruined camp. It promised to be a long, long night. They couldn't start burning anything that night, but they didn't want any of their old buddies coming back to try and take a bite out of them.

The Asian boy followed her to the nearest pile of bodies. "I'm Glenn," he said helpfully.

Emma nodded. "Hi Glenn," she said, kneeling down and shoving her knife into the nearest skull. She made her way through the pile, stabbing every body just in case.

Once they'd made sure that none of the bodies were coming back, Glenn would grab the arms and Emma grabbed the legs to start piling the bodies, a little ways from the RV. While most of the men stayed up to start helping secure the camp, the women retreated into the RV with the children. Except for Emma, the only girl outside was the blonde in mourning, whose name was Andrea, according to Glenn. The dead girl was her younger sister Amy.

As Emma dragged another body towards the burn pile, her mind wandered back to her own family in New Hampshire. She'd been an only child- according to her mother, Emma's stubborn attitude was the surest form of birth control- but it had always been nice, just the three of them. Her mother taught her to cook and play the piano, her father took her hunting and taught her to fix a car and handle her finances. They'd come to all her school functions and cried when they drove her to the airport as she moved to Savannah.

Her parents were young and relatively strong…Emma could only hope they were alright. They would be alright.

That thought didn't stop her from plunging her knife into the nearest walker body extra violently.

"What're you still doin' out here?" A voice grunted beside her. Emma turned to see a tall, scruff-looking man with a crossbow slung across his back. She hadn't seen him during the day, but she remembered him running in with Rick at the end of the struggle.

"Figured you'd be in sleeping' with the rest of the women," the man continued, slamming a pickaxe into a walker's forehead, causing the soul to cave in and brain goop to start dripping out.

Emma wrinkled her nose. "Well, these things aren't going to pile up themselves." She grabbed the wrists of the walker in front of her to pull to the burn pile.

The man started tugging over his own body. "You weren't in our camp." It was more of a statement than a question, but Emma still felt the need to respond.

"No. I traded some supplies for water, had my car break down on me, and started shooting when I heard the screaming." She grunted as she lifted the walker onto the pile.

"They ain't your people," The man said, as if that made any difference.

Emma narrowed her eyes at him. "They don't exactly look like your people either," she said, a little snarky. "I just don't think they deserved to have their faces chomped, that's all."

There was a moment of silence while Emma and the redneck sized each other up. Emma wasn't even sure what he was looking for, but she wasn't about to back down.

Finally, the guy relaxed. "Grab that guy's legs." He said, jerking his head towards a larger walker that Emma doubted either of them could lift alone. She nodded slowly and moved around to grab the legs as the redneck grasped the arms.

"I'm Emma." She threw out, not really comfortable calling him 'the redneck' all the time.

"Daryl." He grunted as they threw the walker on the burn pile.

They were still piling up bodies when the sun started rising the next morning and the survivors were looking completely drained.

Emma wiped her forehead, staring at the ever growing piles that needed to be burned or buried. Her eyes took in the carnage, even more brutal looking in the daylight, and she somehow found the girl from the night before laying across the top. Her eyes had dimmed and the blood had stopped flowing, but she still stared in wide-eyed terror at the danger she'd faced in her last moments.

As Emma looked at the bloody pile, she sensed the telltale tightening at the base of her neck.

She put her knife into the leather sheath on her hip and left the pile to find Rick. He and Shane were talking quietly away from the RV, occasionally glancing towards Andrea and the still unmoving body. It was only a matter of time… Emma figured that was the exact conversation that the two men were having, trying to figure out what to do with the dead sister.

Rick saw that she was standing there awkwardly and waved for her to come over.

"Sorry to bother you," she said, glancing at Shane for any sign of anger or annoyance. Surprisingly, there was none- only tiredness. "Now that it's a little light out, I figured I could get my things now."

"Of course," Rick said. "Shane can take you up there, so you can bring everything back in his jeep." He looked at his friend. "That okay?"

Emma figured that helping her out was the last thing Shane wanted to do, but the man just nodded.

"Sure. Come on," He jerked his head at Emma before walking towards a jeep parked on the edge of camp. Emma followed warily- she hadn't forgotten the look he'd given her the day before, but there was no real reason not to trust him.

They climbed into the Jeep and Emma pointed Shane up the road where she'd broken down. When they reached the car, she dug around in her ammo bag to reload her rifle while Shane popped the hood.

"Well, your transmission is shot to hell," Shane said after rummaging around for a few minutes. "Given the circumstances, I'd suggest siphoning whatever fuel is left in here and just getting a new car."

"That's what I was afraid of," Emma said, sighing. "Well then I guess I need to start packing up."

"I'll start putting stuff in my Jeep." Shane said, causing Emma to look up sharply. The guy seems to be under the impression that she would be staying with them.

Shane noticed her look and shrugged. "Even if you decide not to stick with up, we'll have extra cars now." Not a nice thought, but Emma supposed it was a true one.

She nodded slowly and began to get all of her supplies together. She'd built up a decent amount of supplies, food and water, and even with the medicine she'd already given to the group, she still had a knapsack full. She grabbed a water bottle from the back seat and the bottle of Alleve from her knapsack. She glanced at Shane before swallowing the pills- she didn't like advertising that she needed medication anyway, and she still wasn't sure about this guy.

As Shane loaded her last bag into the Jeep, Emma had both of her guns reloaded and her knapsack was slung over her shoulder. "Ready to head back?" She nodded and loaded her gun into the front. Before she could climb in herself, Shane's hand landed on her shoulder.

Emma tensed up immediately- the last time she'd had physical contact was in Crawford, and it hadn't been friendly.

"Listen, I want to apologize. For yesterday."

Emma's eyebrows shot up. She certainly hadn't pegged Shane as an apologetic sort of guy. He'd seemed too…proud, she supposed, to be apologetic.

"I mean…" Shane said, running a hand through his hair. "I was out of line, snapping at you like that. You saved Carl, who knows how many of us you saved by showing up when you did. I've just been…" The guy looked lost, as if he was trying to figure out what to say. "I just want to make sure everyone's safe," he finally said. "I didn't want to bring in anyone could compromise that."

Emma nodded slowly. "I understand that. I was potentially dangerous." She didn't point out that she'd basically made herself appear weaker, not more dangerous. She didn't share that a group protecting itself could easily become another Crawford.

"I get it," she repeated. "No hard feelings."

Shane gave her a half smile. "Let's head back. There's a lot to do."

Emma nodded and climbed into the Jeep. But even though Shane had apologized, and seemed perfectly nice, something still felt wrong. He didn't talk much on the way back, but he was relaxed- she was no longer a threat, apparently.

But Emma just couldn't shake the feeling that lingered- the urge to get as far away as possible.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author****'****s Note/Disclaimer: **I don't own The Walking Dead. Sadly. I'm really glad it's almost back, hopefully it'll pick up a little bit. After the first few episodes it was a little slow this season, except for the midseason finale. That was cruel and unusual. A shoutout to Guest for reviewing- it made me so, so happy to see how much you like this story! I also apologize to you guys for two things: one, this was supposed to be up yesterday, but for some reason the sever wasn't working so I couldn't upload. Two, I had a bit of a rough time writing for Daryl, since he's got a very distinct way of speaking and I'm not sure if I was doing it correctly. If not, I am open to suggestions on how to improve! I hope this chapter makes up for the wait!

**Chapter Five: **

Shane and Emma pulled back into the campsite as more of the surviving camp members started trickling out of their tents and the RV. Andrea was still hunched over Amy- after Shane parked he went over to Rick and Lori's huddle, all glancing back at the two blondes.

Emma didn't want to get involved- it wasn't her place, she wasn't even a part of this group- but before she could go help with the body piling, she was waylaid by a sudden hug around her midsection. She looked down to see Carl, grinning up at her like they hadn't been almost eaten less than twelve hours ago.

"I thought you'd left, Emma!" He said, holding on tightly.

"Nah, Shane was just helping me grab my stuff," Emma said, patting the boy awkwardly on the head. He pulled away and she noticed a little girl had come up quietly behind them.

"This is Sophia. I told her all about how you saved me last night!" Carl said brightly.

Sophia had blonde hair and big blue eyes which were starting up at Emma in wonder. "You really fought all those Walkers?" She asked, and it struck Emma that she hadn't seen any of the women last night actually fighting.

"Yeah, I did." She said, smiling softly at the girl. "Couldn't just let them get everyone, could I?"

Before either of the kids could respond, Daryl stomped away from the overall group, yelling back over his shoulder, "Y'all left my brother for dead!"

He gestured wildly at the pile of bodies, causing Sophia to squeak and hide slightly behind Emma as Morales yelled at Daryl to shut up. "You had this comin'!"

Heat rose in the pit of Emma's stomach and she left the two kids to walk up to Daryl. "You want to try shutting up?" She demanded, not noticing everyone else's gaze on her. "I think we've got enough problems without you acting like an asshole!"

Daryl's eyes narrowed dangerously. He probably wasn't used to a girl getting up in his face like she was, especially when said girl was barely 5'4".

"Since when are you a part of 'we'?" He snapped, glaring at Emma, who glared right back at him. "You ain't a part of this group. You're just a chick who thinks she knows how to use a gun, who stumbled her way into a group where she ain't got no right to be!"

At that, Emma's temper flared. She certainly didn't think of herself as a member of this group but she was not about to let this guy, who barely seemed like he was a part of this group himself, tell her what she was or was not to them.

"You ever want to see who can shoot best, you just say so," She said, crossing her arms and planting her feet straight in front of Daryl, like an annoying root he couldn't pull up and toss away. That was her favorite method of annoying a person. "But everybody has been through enough in the last twelve hours without adding an emotional asshole into this!"

Daryl jerked his finger at Rick and the others, eyes blazing. "They left my brother handcuffed to a goddamn roof!" He yelled.

"And why was that?" Emma countered. "I haven't been around long, I'll give you that. But the decision to kick me out was for the sake of the group, and I respect that. What was your brother doing to get himself handcuffed to a roof?"

Silence followed the question, which told Emma everything she needed to know. She just turned on her heel and went back to the pile of bodies, preparing to toss them on the fire. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed people were staring, but she just huffed and started piling wood around the Walker bodies.

Unfortunately, the silence was short-lived.

"They got Jim, a Walker bit Jim!" One of the women who'd started helping with the bodies jumped up and away from the man who'd talked about digging holes the night before. The men of the camp started circling him, and he held up a shovel to defend himself. Eventually one of the guys got behind him and grabbed his arms, allowing Daryl to pull up his shirt to reveal the dark, blood-stained bite against the pale skin.

Emma's hand had immediately flown to the knife on her hip, gripping the handle tightly. She also stepped a few feet to the side, planting herself between the infected man and the children, whose mothers came running from the fire pit.

"I'm okay, I'm okay," The man kept saying, but Emma could see his knees shaking, as if he'd fall over if he wasn't being held up. The men led Jim over to the bumper of the RV and sat him down before congregating a few feet away. Emma took her hand off the handle of her knife, but only slightly relaxed her legs.

"I say we put a pickaxe in his head, and the dead girl's, and be done with it," Daryl said, pacing slightly back and forth.

"Is that what you'd want if it were you?" Shane challenged.

"Yeah, and I'd thank you while you did it!" Daryl retorted.

"I hate to say it, I never thought I would, but maybe Daryl's right," Dale said. Emma, who was standing off to the side but still slightly included in the group, glanced up at the older man. The poor guy looked so confused and upset at his own thought, but she knew he had a point. If Jim was bit, he didn't have long, no matter which was you looked at it. It was only a matter of time before the fever took over.

"Jim's not a monster, Dale, or some rabid dog!" Rick spat out. "He's sick. If we start down that road, where do we draw the line?"

"The line's clear," Daryl countered. "Zero tolerance for Walkers, or them-to-be."

"We start thinking like that, and we're no better than the group Emma was a with." Rick said, causing all eyes to turn on her. "Tossing people out, killing them just because we're scared!" Rick started pacing. "What if we could get him help? I heard that the CDC was working on a cure."

"We all heard that," Emma said, folding her arms. "All the broadcasts said to just stay put, the CDC would work it all out." She shrugged, betraying a hint of exhaustion. "Still haven't seen any sign of things being 'worked out'."

"The CDC being up and running is a stretch." Shane said after a minute.

"If there is any government left, they'd protect the CDC!" Rick insisted. "It's our best bet for food and shelter, maybe a cure!"

"Look man, we all want those things," Shane said calmly. "But if they exist, they're in Fort Benning. It's out of the hot zone, it'll be heavily armed-"

"The military was on the front lines of this thing and they got overrun!" Rick argued. "The CDC is our best hope, and maybe Jim's only chance!"

There was another pause as the group considered these thoughts. Emma didn't know what to think- she personally felt that the CDC was a waste of time, but Jim wasn't her primary concern. Rick was trying to do what was the best for a group and a sick man.

She also couldn't see how leading a group into what was a heavily populated area was any better- Fort Benning had housed nearly 50,000 military members along, not including families and anyone off-duty.

She tensed when she noticed Daryl tightening his grip on the pickaxe he was holding. "You go looking for an aspirin," he said. "Somebody needs to have some balls to take care of this damn problem!" He raised the axe and went running towards Jim.

Emma wasn't sure what compelled her other than the thought that Jim was still a person\- not a Walker- and she dashed in between the two as Rick pulled out his gun.

"We don't kill the living!" He seethed.

Daryl glared back at him. "Funny, coming from the man who just put a gun to my head."

"He's still a person," Emma said, causing both men to look at her. She kept one arm in front of her and one behind, glaring up at the bigger man like a mother dog. "Disagree on whatever else you want, but Jim's still a person. He deserves better than a sneak attack to the head."

Daryl looked back and forth between them before throwing the pickaxe down and stomping away. Emma lowered her arms slowly, still watching in case he whirled around and tried again.

"Thank you," Jim said weakly behind her as Rick hauled him to his feet.

"Don't thank me," Emma muttered. "I just bought you some time. I didn't fix a damn thing." She turned on her heel and walked back to the pile of bodies, not looking at anyone.

She didn't look up once as the bodies burned, not even at the sound of the gunshot a few minutes later.

One down, one to go.

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The sun shone overhead and slowly began descending as the camp began to load the bodies of their former fellows into the back of a pick-up truck and drove them up the hill for a burial.

Emma stood at the back watching silently as the bodies of the former campers were lowered into the holes and buried. The blonde woman, Andrea, insisted on lowering her sister into the grave herself, though Dale was able to help her a little.

She watched the burials, but didn't move as everyone started trickling down the hill to the campsite. She knew that there would be another discussion about where to go, but she wasn't sure she wanted to be part of it. Benning or Atlanta, she couldn't imagine that either result would be good.

Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Rick part ways from his wife and son and start walking towards her. She waited him out, staring at the makeshift graces, until he spoke first.

"I really appreciate your support with Jim," He said, looking down towards the RV where the man was being held for his own safety.

Emma shrugged. "It was the right thing to do."

"I still appreciate it." Rick said, glancing at her. "I, uh, I guess I was wondering what your thoughts were on where to go."

Emma looked at him sharply. "Why ask me?"

Rick shrugged, an almost rueful smile tugging at his lips. "You've been privy to a lot more experience than I have. You've been out on your own." He paused, gathering his thoughts to expand on that.

"I was in a coma when this all started," He said. "When I woke up, the world was…like this. All I've been doing since is trying to find my wife and son."

Though he never put it into words, Emma could hear what he was saying- he didn't know what he was doing. He was leading his group, but he didn't know how to do it.

"Honestly? I think they're both pipe dreams." Emma said, rubbing the base of her neck. "Waiting for a cure, going to a military base, they both sound far-fetched and dangerous, especially with a group that includes kids. But it is your group, and your decision shouldn't be based on the opinion of an outsider."

Rick looked at her strangely. "An outsider?" He repeated. "Emma, you saved my son's life. You've defended our entire group and you stood with a member who was in danger."

"That doesn't mean anything," Emma argued, but it sounded weak even to her. "I'm not a part of this group." 

Rick shook his head and started back down the hill. "As far as we're concerned, you are." He said simply.


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note/Disclaimer: **I do not own The Walking Dead. And I apologize, I meant to have this out to you guys on Friday but I had a leadership conference in Indiana all weekend and I had no time to breathe, let alone type this all up. Not to mention Wifi was ridiculously expensive. However, to make up for it, I do believe this is one of the longest chapters I've written, so it should be satisfying! Please review and let me know how I'm doing!

**Chapter Six:**

Emma stayed out at the burial site for a long time, trying to figure out what her next move should be. It would be dark soon, and she doubted anyone would seriously consider traveling while it was dark, but she had to make a decision before they left.

The fairly obvious and simple choice was to separate from the group. Neither idea of heading to Atlanta or Fort Benning sounded like a good one to her, and she knew that she could survive on her own. She'd done it already. When the group left, she could take one of the cars that no longer had a driver and head…somewhere else. Maybe make her way home.

It was possible, maybe even preferable. But for some reason, she was hesitating.

'_As far as we're concerned, you are.'_

Rick's words kept bouncing around inside her head, bringing her back to the foreign idea of staying with this group.

After Crawford, Emma thought she would never consider staying with another group of people. She knew her own limits and what her particular condition could mean for her in this harsh, unforgiving world. She could handle it on her own. Other people, however, had proved that they couldn't and Emma didn't want to wait until her next flare up to learn that this group would dump her without a second thought.

But was this group really like that? They were traveling, with children, after all, and on older man. And for the most part they all were willing to do whatever they could to help Jim, who was basically already dead. They weren't strangers to members needing help.

They had not seen her on a bad day yet, but Emma had built up her stock of medications well enough. And if she was eventually kicked out, she could just be on her way.

The sun was beginning to set, so Emma walked back down the hill into the camp. Most of the survivors were huddled around the fire pit, though some were working to move any tents that hadn't been destroyed closer to the RV.

As she got closer to the group, Shane and Rick walked up and Shane stepped to the middle of the group's circle.

"I've been thinking about Rick's plan." Shane said with no preamble, leaning on his gun and running a hand through his hair.

"There are no guarantees either way, I'lll be the first to admit that." He paused and looked up at Rick, sitting with his family. "I've known this man a long time. I trust his instincts. I say that the most important thing here is that we need to stay together. So, those of you that agree, we leave first thing in the morning."

At that, the group split up into smaller groups- Morales and his wife gathered together to talk quietly, Dale helped Andrea (who was practically dead on her feet) into the RV, Rick and Lori huddled around Carl.

Emma had been leaning with her back against the RV, and she suddenly realized just how tired she was. She hadn't slept since the attack, and she'd spent a great deal of that time moving bodies and making sure everything dead stayed dead. Not only could she use her medication, she really could use some time to crash.

She made her way over to Shane's Jeep, intending to roll out her blankets under the RV- she'd never actually grabbed herself a tent, she'd always just slept in her car- but the RV could provide good cover, as long as she didn't forget and smack her head on it in the morning. As she pulled out her blankets, she glanced over her shoulder before grabbing her medicine.

"Hey, Emma, you need a place to sleep right?" Glenn popped up behind her almost silently- now she knew how he'd survived- almost making her drop her bottle. It still rattled loudly before she shoved it between the blankets.

"I was working on it." She said, trying not to look guilty. And she wasn't guilty, she just didn't want to make her medication more obvious than it needed to be.

"Well, Andrea isn't using her tent, so you could stay there for the night," He said helpfully. "I don't think she'll mind." He glanced back at the RV, but he had a point. Andrea was probably thinking about a lot of things, but her tent wouldn't be one of them.

"Thanks." Emma said, folding her blankets up and walking towards the dark blue tent that Glenn had indicated.

"What were you planning on doing?" Glenn asked, walking along by her.

"I was going to sleep under the RV." She said honestly. Glenn let out a burst of laughter before seeing her erased eyebrows.

"Wait, seriously?"

"Yeah." She said smirking a little bit. "Low enough that Walkers can't get me easy, shaded, cover from the rain. I've slept worse places."

Glenn kept staring as if he couldn't tell if she was joking or not. She just winked as she crawled into the tent. As she rolled out her blankets, she heard Glenn wander off muttering "Under the RV!" and she couldn't help but chuckle for the first time in a long time.

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Ever the early riser, the sun was just peeking out above the horizon when Emma woke the next morning. It didn't seem like anyone else was up, and Emma wanted them to get their sleep, so she just rolled up her own belongings and saved taking down the tent for later. She also folded the blankets and packed the items she assumed were Andrea's. She left the bags outside the tent and stretched, watching the sun.

Looking at the sunrise, sometimes it was easy to forget the world had ended. She used to get up to watch the sunrise back home, and this looked almost exactly the same. Minus the fact that the red streaks in the sky no reminded her of blood.

She started walking up the hill to the burial sites, giving her legs an opportunity to wake up and stretch. As she reached the crest of the hill, she heard murmuring and she slowly put her hand on her knife, creeping towards it slowly, before realizing that she was stalking Rick Grimes.

"I'm leaving a note and a map behind for you, taped to a red car," He said, and Emma realized he was speaking into a walkie-talkie. "We're heading to the CDC. If there's anything left, it's got to be there, don't you think?"

He paused, tensing up, and Emma thought he'd realized she was there. But when he spoke again, he sounded so desperate that Emma knew he hadn't he would never betray that much doubt to any member of a group he led.

"Morgan…I hope you were right about that place. I need you to be."

He waited another minute, but there was no response on the other end. Eventually he stuck the walkie on his waistband and stood up, looking out over the horizon towards Atlanta. Emma wondered if she could walk back to camp without him heaving, but he turned slightly. "Didn't expect anyone to be up this early."

"Stretching my legs." Emma said, sticking her hands in the pockets of her jeans and walking up to him. "I get jumpy on long trips."

Rick looked at her carefully. "So you are coming to the CDC?"

Emma nodded, and Rick let out a surprised breath.

"I've gotta admit, I wasn't betting on you," Rick admitted, putting his hands on his hips. "You didn't seem sold on it."

"I'm not," Emma said, smirking a little at the confusion on the cop's face. "I don't know if going to the CDC is a good idea or not. But you seem like good people, and traveling on my own is getting lonely."

This was only part of it, of course, and she didn't tell Rick that she was ready to leave at any sign of trouble or them turning on her. But Rick looked at her gratefully, taking her joining them as a sign of her trust. She supposed, tentatively, it was.

They stood there for a few minutes, watching the sun continue creep up steadily. They also started hearing noises down int he camp as the inhabitants began to rise and pack up their belongings for the long drive.

"Do you really think that CDC will have a cure?" Emma blurted out. "Do you think they'll be able to help us?"

Emma didn't believe in miracles anymore, not in this world. She didn't believe that it could be that easy, that they could wander up to the CDC and they would have a cure and everything would be alright again.

She didn't believe it. But she wanted to.

"They have to." Rick said, leaving no room for doubt in his voice.

This was a man she could follow.

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"Everybody listen up." Shane said, gathering all the survivors around the fire pit one last time. "Those of you with CBs, we're going to be on channel 40. If you have a problem and don't have a CB, can't get a signal, you hit your horn one time. That'll stop the caravan. Any questions?"

Morales and his wife looked at each other, and Morales stepped forward. "Yeah. We're not going."

There was a moment of silence. Emma sized the family up- able-bodied, but with two young children. She'd seen families like this leave Crawford. For better or worse, none had come back.

"We have family in Birmingham. We want to be with our people." The wife said.

"You won't have anyone to watch your back," Shane warned, and Morales nodded.

"We'll take the chance. I've got to do what's best for my family. "

The group said their goodbyes- the men handed off an extra gun and a box of ammo as the women hugged. The little girl handed her doll off to Sophia, who was enfolded into her mothers arms as she cried.

As the group started piling into cars, Emma grabbed her knapsack from Shane's Jeep. She wasn't sure where they wanted her, but she was not going to ride in the RV with Jim. She felt bad for him, but she was not keen on exposing herself to that risk.

Carl, Sophia and her mother Carol all crawled into the back of Rick's car, Daryl and Shane each took one, T-Dog and Andrea took a van, and everyone else piled into the RV.

"Emma! Do you wanna ride with us?" Carl asked, sticking his head out the window. "Sophia and I have Uno cards!"

Emma smiled a bit. "It looks kinda crowded in there, bud. I'll hitch a ride with someone else for now." Carl pouted and climbed back inside the car.

"I've got room." Shane offered, pulling on his baseball cap. Emma eyed him for a minutes before nodding and climbing into the passenger seat.

The line of cars started up and moved off- the leaving family turned right at the fork out, waving, as the rest of the cars turned left towards the outskirts of Atlanta.

Because Shane's Jeep was open-walled, the rushing wind made it too loud for conversation, which Emma was grateful for. She wasn't much for small talk and she wasn't sure what she and Shane would discuss anyway. They had been driving for a couple of hours when the CB crackled.

"Guys? We've got a problem, Dale needs to stop," Glenn said. Emma leaned out of the Jeep slightly and saw some smoke coming from the RV as the cars began to slow.

"Oh boy." Shane said, parking the Jeep closely to the other cars. "Just what we need."

As Emma turned to exit the Jeep, a rippling pain shot across the back of her neck. "Ah, shit." She swore, reaching up one hand to the base of her neck. Rubbing it didn't help anything, but she always did just as a habit. She took an Alleve and a quick drink of water, but all she could do at this point was wait. She squared her shoulders and walked towards the group, trying not to turn much.

Dale and Rick were looking into the engine of the RV. "I told you we'd never get far on that hose." Dale said with a sigh. "It's more duct tape than hose, and I'm out of duct tape."

Shane was peering through his binoculars towards a dark mass up the road. "Looks like there's a gas station." He pointed out. "I can go ahead, see what I can bring back."

T-Dog volunteered to go along as Jaquei scrambled out of the RV.

"Y'all, Jim, it's bad. I don't think he can take any more."

Rick went into the RV as the others started re-situating their vehicles. Sophia Carl were still in their car with the window cracked, playing Go Fish. Emma crawled into the front next to Carl, leaning over the back of the seat to watch.

"You guys doing okay back here?" She asked as Sophia took possession of Carl's two.

"It's hot," Carl said, wrinkling his nose. "When are we going to be moving again?"

"Soon." Emma said, glancing at the RV. "Shane's getting us what was need to fix up the camper and we'll be going." She glanced towards the group of people outside before reaching into her bag for a box of Gobstoppers. Not only were they a favorite candy of hers, but they lasted forever. "You want to snack on these until we get going again?"

Both children's eyes lit up at the offering and thanked Emma before starting to munch on the candy. Emma watched a few more rounds before leaving the two to their game. As she exited the car, Rick was stepping out of the RV and she quickened her pace to reach the group gathering around him.

"Jim says that he's done," Rick said, glancing back at the open door of the RV. "He wants us to leave him here."

"And he's lucid?" Carol asked hesitantly, wringing her hands.

"He seems to be." Rick said. "I would say yes."

"Back in the camp, when I said Daryl might be right and you shut me down, you misunderstood." Dale said softly. "I was just gonna suggest that we ask Jim what he wants."

"I don't know, man," Shane said, crossing his arms. He and T-Dog must've just gotten back, she saw the other man was holding a hose. "Leaving a man by the side of the road? I dunno if I could live with that."

"It's not your call." Lori pointed out. "Either one of you."

Emma nodded from the front of the RV where she was leaning. "It was wrong to kill him in cold blood," She said. "But this is what he wants. It's his answer. The very least we can do for him now is respect it."

The group was quiet after that. Rick and Shane carried Jim out of the RV, taking him across the road and leaning him up against a tree. There was a slight breeze, which Emma felt sure would feel wonderful with Jim's fever. The group all stepped up then to say their goodbyes, kneeling at Jim's side.

Again Emma hung back. She had exchanged very few words with Him, and she wanted those who did know him to have their privacy. After a few minutes, however, he tiled his head her way and called for her.

Emma hesitantly crouched down next to the dying man, whose head lolled to the side to see her more clearly. "Thank you." He said breathing heavily. "I know you said….back there that you hadn't…changed anything, but you did. You…let me… chose."

Emma's back was practically screaming at her to straighten, but she kept her face blank and half smiled at Jim. "I wish I had changed more," She murmured.

"You stay tough." Jim said, eyes boring into hers. "You do…what you can. Don't break."

Emma stared, wondering for a brief moment if Jim knew how much pain she was in, but she didn't ask and the rest of the group started piling back in to their cars. Rick put a hand on her shoulder and tilted his head towards the cars. Emma looked back at Jim and reached out to squeeze his hand.

"I promise."


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's Note/Disclaimer: **I do not own The Walking Dead. Sadly. Also, how happy am I now that Rick is back to no beard?! I mean I love him but I'm not a facial hair person. I've been watching a lot of season one to make sure I'm getting these chapters right, and I've just been swooning over pre-beard Rick with his super blue eyes (seriously do they do something to those things or are they just naturally that freaking gorgeous?!). And thank God he cut his hair too. Thanks go out to the people who've reviewed: An Amber Pen, Ellarose181 and AnikaHerondale. They make my day! Sorry this chapter is a little late, yesterday was actually my birthday and I've been out doing things all day!

**Chapter Seven:**

The ride to Atlanta was more subdued after they left Jim. Shane suggested that Emma ride in the RV, and she graciously accepted. In there it was easier to balance out her neck by laying back on one of the benches and borrowing a pillow.

The medication still hadn't kicked in and she could tell she was getting to the point where turning her head would be painful, so she'd have to rotate her entire body to look in a certain direction. She leaned her head back further, hoping desperately it would crack- sometimes that provided her with a bit of relief. She popped another Alleve and closed her eyes, waiting for it to just go away.

The sun was just setting as the caravan of cars pulled up to the outside of the CDC. Everyone grabbed their weapons and headed for the door. Emma rolled herself off the couch, hissing slightly, and bent her whole body down to pick up her rifle and follow the others out. As long as she kept her head level, it would be fine.

It would be fine.

They had only to open the door to the RV to hear the flies. The noise was overwhelming, buzzing over the rotten and decaying bodies that were piled everywhere. The bodies looked like they hadn't even been walkers- they were burned, bloody, torn apart and some were practically liquified.

And God the smell was awful.

Emma pulled her sleeve up over her wrist and covered her nose, trying to breathe through her mouth and walk straight and keep her head level all once.

Shane and Rick took the lead, shepherding the group with "shhhhh's" and "keep going", "stay together".

Emma stayed near the back, making sure to keep the mothers and kids in her sight. They were the weakest links and needed the most protection. The group had to tiptoe over bodies that may or may not have been dead, silently, and around the barricades that the military had set up. Based on the amount of blood splashed on the barricades, it hadn't worked.

As the group finally reached the front doors, they noticed that there were heavy, aluminum shutters locked down tight over the front. Rick and Shane started pushing on them, then knocking, which echoed loudly back onto the streets and made Emma jump a little bit.

"There's nobody here," T-Dog said, already backing away to get back to the cars. The light was steadily trickling away, making the entire group more nervous.

"Then why are the shutters down?" Rick argued, still trying to push them open.

"Walker!" 

As Daryl called out the danger, Emma automatically turned her head to try and find the threat to keep it away. Her body reacted to the sudden twist violently- she let out a gasp of pain, grabbing her neck as her knees buckled and a sharp stabbing sensation shot through her neck.

Glenn, who'd been standing close to her, scurried over to catch her before she hit the ground. "Oh shit, guys I think Emma's down!"

Emma could hear the children whimpering and Daryl's furious voice saying "You lead us into a graveyard!" but it was all she could do to stay on her feet and keep her head steady.

"He made a call!" Dale insisted, walking quickly over to Glenn and Emma and helping to hold her upright.

"It was the wrong damn call!"

"Where are we going to go?" Carol said, almost hysterical, as she and Lori tried to shield their kids from both the walkers and from Emma, whose face was contorted in pain as she tried to straighten up.

"We can't be this close to the city after dark!" Lori insisted.

Shane tried to suggest Fort Benning again, but Emma knew- and Andrea voiced- that this was a horrible idea, even more-so than it had been when it was first suggested, because it was over 100 miles back the way they had come and all the cars were running low on fuel.

Glenn's hand slipped and Emma's knees hit the ground, jolting her neck. She gritted her teeth but a keening whine still escaped, causing the group to look her way again.

"Let's get out of here," T-Dog said, starting to shepherd people back to the cars with Shane.

"Can you make it?" Shane asked, stopping by Glenn, Dale and Emma. His voice was low and rushed. "We need to go now, can you move?"

"Shane, she is clearly in a lot of pain-" Dale started, but Emma forced herself up and shook him off.

"I'm fine, I've got it!" She snapped, gripping her rifle tightly and wobbling a few steps.

Glenn followed her, eyes wide. "Emma you need help! You're clearly hurting and-"

"I said I've got it!" She hissed, but when she tried to turn back to the road a zing of pain shot through her spine and her knees buckled.

"Oh shit!" Glenn hoisted her up by the shoulders as Shane went back for Rick.

"The camera moved, it moved!" Rick was insisting as Shane was dragging him away.

"It is dead, man!" Shane retorted. "It's an automated device, its gears are winding down, no come on! We need to get the kids away from here and Emma off the streets!"

Shane and Rick started shoving at each other before Rick started screaming at the camera and Lori started screaming at him.

"I know you're in there, I know you can hear me!" Rick said, banging on the doors. "Please, we have women, children, one of us is hurting bad, no food, hardly any gas left!"

Glenn tried to hoist Emma up with her arm over his shoulders, and she noticed Rick glancing back at them desperately.

"Rick! We need to get everyone out of here!" Glenn called, urging Emma to start moving back. Lori ran over to Rick and was trying to shove him back, causing Carl to run over to Glenn and Emma for cover.

"Emma?" The poor kid was looking at her, terrified, and she gritted her teeth and forced her head down to look at him.

"It's okay, Carl." She said, voicing cracking a bit. "Everything's okay, your dad's taking car of it. Just don't be scared, okay?"

"If you don't let us in, you're killing us!" Rick yelled, causing Carl to whimper and run for his mother.

"You're killing us! You're killing us!"

Suddenly a loud screech filled the air and a shutter opened, flooding the group with a violently bright light. Emma winced, but had to admit that she was slightly grateful for a different discomfort to focus on as Glenn started dragging her towards the door after the others. The inside of the building was pristine, almost untouched by the carnage outside.

The clacking of a gun was quick to remind the group of their current situation.

"Anybody infected?" Called a man in the corner, hidden in the shadows but very clearly pointing a gun their way.

"One of our group was." Rick answered honestly. "He didn't make it."

The gun jerked towards Glenn and Emma. "What about her?"

"I'm not infected." Emma ground out, hissing as she tried to straighten up again. "I just need-"

"She's hurting a lot," Rick threw out, missing the glare that Emma shot his way. "All we're asking for is a chance."

The man seemed to consider this. "That's asking an awful lot these days." His eyes roamed over their group as he stepped into the light. He had blonde hair and a worn face, but what struck Emma were his eyes- tired, not from a lack of sleep, but from a lack of hope.

"You will all submit to a blood test, that's the price of admission." He said finally, lowering his gun. "You got stuff to bring in, do it now. Once this door closes it stays closed."

The group scrambled after that. Glenn handed Emma off to Jaquei while he ran out to get the bags with the other men, though Emma noticed he retrieved her knapsack for her. She'd have to thank him later.

The shutters were closed and the man who'd introduced himself as Dr. Edwin Jenner directed them to an elevator.

"Doctors always go around packin' heat like that?" Daryl snarked.

Jenner shrugged. "There were plenty left lying around so I familiarized myself. But you all look harmless enough." He narrowed his eyes playfully at Carl. "Except you. I'll have to keep an eye on you."

He lead the group into a large open room and Jaquei carefully leaned Emma down into a chair nearby. The lights went up, revealing an empty circle of computers.

"Where is everybody? The other doctors?" Rick asked.

Jenner smiled darkly. "I'm it. It's just me hear." He demonstrated that the only 'person' left was computer with a voice box named Vi, and Emma's hope for a cure (or anything at all) plummeted. This one guy alone couldn't possibly have it.

He pulled out a pack of needles for the blood tests and glanced over Emma's way. "Maybe I'd better start with you."

"Just as long as I don't have to get up." She muttered, rolling up the left sleeve of her plaid button-up.

Jenner walked over and made to grab the other arm, but Emma stuck her left arm in his face. "Trust me doc. This vein is easier." After countless blood draws, Emma had become sort of an unofficial expert about which arm was better for needles.

Jenner raised his eyebrows before trying the rubber band on her arm and inserting the needle. Emma barely flinched. "You're used to this routine." It wasn't a question but she figured she might as well end the suspense anyway.

"I was diagnosed with systemic lupus erythematosus my sophomore year of college," She said, blinking slowly as the needle came out. "Before that there was a good year's worth of blood draws.

"Ah. So that's the problem here?" Jenner said, gesturing to her rigid posture. "No medicine?"

"I have some. Doesn't always cooperate." She winced as her head twitched. "Just need to lie down for a couple of hours." Usually it worked best with a heating pad, but she wasn't going to hold out hope that one of those was just lying around.

"We don't have any beds, but the couches are pretty comfortable." Jenner said. "I'll show you to the rooms when I'm done here."

Normally Emma would have just nodded and left it at that, but her neck was not onboard with that so she muttered "thanks" before Jenner pulled over another chair. He wasn't going to make her get up, which she was grateful for.

"How about the kids go first, to get it over with?"

Lori and Carol nudged the two children forward, wanting them to be cleared quickly, but neither Carl or Sophia looked too keen to get near the needles.

"It's okay guys." Emma said, throwing them a small smile. "I've done this thousands of times, it's really not that bad." She playfully winked at them before whispering, "I bet you anything that Daryl's going to get really freaked out by the needle. Think you can show him how to be brave?"

Daryl huffed a little at her comment, but it put a little smile on Carl's face like he'd had in the elevator, and he plunked right down in the chair next to Emma to hold out his arm.

Though they winced, neither child made a sound and soon Jenner was on to the adults.

"It this even necessary?" Andrea asked during her turn. "If we were infected we'd all be running a fever."

"I've already broken every rule in the book letting you in here." Jenner said, sliding the needle out. "At least let me be thorough."

Andrea swayed when she stood, prompting Jaquei to tell Jennner that they hadn't eaten in awhile. T-Dog was the last to go, and Jenner stood and lead the group into the kitchen, Glenn back to helping Emma stagger along.

Everyone's eyes widened as they saw the stock of food in the kitchen- not just non-perishables, but actual meet and eggs and cheese, things they could refrigerate and cook. "Help yourselves," Jenner said with a slight smile. "There's plenty for everyone."

The group rushed to the food, but Emma hung back. She was hungry, but she really just wanted to rest her neck.

"Could you show me to the couches?" She asked quietly of Jenner and he nodded, leading her back out the hallway to a narrower hallway lined with doors.

"Take any you like," He offered. "And we have warm water for a shower if that might help. Just go easy on it, alright?"

A hot shower did sound heavenly, but Emma knew from experience she just needed to lay down.

"Thanks Doc." She said tiredly, open in the first door and peeking inside. The rooms weren't huge, really a couch, an end table and a cot, as well as a small bathroom attached. But for a girl who'd been sleeping in her car for two weeks, it was more than heaven.

Emma flopped down on the couch, turning her neck as far as it could go to the side so that it could get used to the position. She sighed in relief before closing her eyes.

If nothing else, the CDC was the safest place for a nap.


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's Note/Disclaimer: **I do not own The Walking Dead. And, thanks to my lovable classes, I haven't even been able to see the Season 5 finally! Gah! My friend assured me that it won't break me quite as much as the midseason finale did (they always put a bigger bang in the middle of the season than at the end, thankfully) but I still plan to have an ample supply of tissues available to me. Thanks to An Amber Pen for her review, I'm not going to be one of those people who withholds chapters until they get reviews but please when you're finished just leave me a little note about how I'm doing! Each one makes me feel like I'm getting better as a writer! I would also like to ask that you guys take the poll on my profile: this story could last quite awhile but my other one might be quite short, so I'm trying to figure out which idea I should work on next! I have a lot of ideas, actually, but the ones included in the poll are the most fleshed out so far. Thanks in advance, everyone!

**Chapter Eight:**

_Emma could feel the sticky, rubbery couch under her cheek through the fog of sleep that still clung to her. She kept her eyes closed, hoping to stay asleep for just a little while longer. She had just rolled over when she heard it- a slight creak of the floorboards._

"_Shhhh you idiot, don't wake her up!" Someone hissed, causing her to tense up. She allowed her hand to drift slowly to the gun holstered on her right hip, careful not to draw attention to the movement as a waking moment. _

"_Who cares? We're just taking her out back anyway," A second voice cackled. "Wonder what's killing this one." _

"_Who cares, just shut up and hold her down." _

_Emma's heart started pounding, she could hear it beat in her ears. She held her breath as the steps came closer and closer, until she sensed the body directly behind her. A hand gingerly landed on her shoulder and she snapped, rolling over in the blink of an eye, swatting the hand away and aiming her gun at-_

"Woah woah Emma! Chill!"

Emma blinked and the room came into focus- not an apartment that was barely decorated and housed two women, but a tiny housing room in the CDC. And she was pointing her gun at Glenn, who was holding one hand up in surrender and a plate of what looked to be chicken and noodels in the other. He also looked like he was about to pee his pants.

"Oh jeez, Glenn, I'm sorry," She said, putting her gun back into its holster and trying to slow the pounding of her heat. She rubbed her eyes blearily, banishing the thought of the two men from her mind. "I thought you were…someone else."

Glenn eyed her warily but she tried to smile at him reassuringly and he sat down on the couch. "I just brought you some of the leftovers from dinner," he said helpfully, holding out the plate and a fork. "Sorry, Daryl took the rest of the wine." The kid kept smiling, and Emma could detect a certain amount of red in his cheeks.

"Not before you had your fair share through, huh?" She teased, making him go even redder before cleaning his throat.

"You feeling any better?" He asked, though he was drunk enough that she could tell the poor guy wasn't really paying attention. And, based on the sauce lines running off her plate, he was going to have some trouble getting back to his room.

"Better." She said, standing up to stretch out. She had no idea why, but lying down (and napping) made her neck feel a lot better. Every time. "What'd I miss?"

Glenn shrugged. "We all ate and had some wine. Shane made Jenner bum us out. And we had hot showers!" He was very enthusiastic about that last part, though Emma couldn't blame him. They hadn't even had hot water in Crawford, and she'd been bathing in rivers for the past few weeks. A hot shower sounded heavenly.

Glenn got up from the couch, staggering a little while laughing. "I've never been this drunk before." He said cheerfully. "Have you ever been drunk?"

Emma watched in amusement as Glenn stumbled around the room, bumping into the couch and walls before sliding down the door. "I was a news reporter." She said dryly before walking over and trying to lift the kid up. "If you weren't getting drunk once or twice a week, you weren't doing your job right."

Glenn started chuckling as Emma hoisted him up from the floor, one arm around her neck (the irony of the role switch didn't escape her) and she opened the door to get him back into his own room.

"Is being drunk usually like this?" Glenn asked, slurring his words a little as he pointed to a room Emma could only assume was his.

"Not in the morning it's not." She grunted as she worked the door open and plopped Glenn down on his couch.

His eyes were already drifting shut, but Emma caught him muttering, "can actually sleep tonight…" and she smiled slightly. She noticed a blanket draped over the arm of the couch and she laid it down over him. He was going to have one hell of a headache in the morning, she may as well make sure he was comfortable now. She also grabbed the trashcan from the bathroom and left it by the couch in case Glenn didn't have time to make it to the toilet.

She shut the door quietly behind her and walked back down the hall to her own room, eager to try out the shower and get back to the food.

It was, in short, perfection. Her skin tingled as the warm water enveloped her, and she stood there for a good five minutes before even starting to clean up. Being able to shampoo her hair and wash out all the tangles was a hidden pleasure she hadn't even realized that she missed.

Needless to say, getting out of the shower was even more difficult now than it had been in the old world.

Pulling her hair up into a short ponytail, Emma stared at herself in the mirror for a moment. She could still see the person she had been before the outbreak, but the face in the mirror was leaner, more wary. Even when she'd been reporting, the circles under her eyes had never been this dark. She fingered her ponytail as well- her reddish-brown hair had been longer in her previous life, but she'd cut it shoulder length when she realized long hair was like a magnet to walker hands.

All in all, Emma looked harder than she ever had before. It had been a necessary change.

She splashed some water on her face and went back to the plate of food. It had cooled off significantly while she'd been showering and looking after Glenn, but it still tasted better than any of the non-perishable items she'd been eating. She practically moaned chewing the noodles, an old favorite of hers she'd missed without realizing it.

There was a small knock at the door as Emma was finishing up. She opened it to see Carol, her hands on both Carl and Sophia's shoulders.

"I'm sorry to bother you," Carol said apologetically. "But the kids wanted to check on you before they went to bed."

Emma smiled at the two children. "That's really sweet you two. I'm feeling much better now, especially since I've had some food and showered!"

Both kids visibly relaxed. "There's a rec room down the hall, there are lots of games to play!" Carl said enthusiastically. "Sophia and I were playing checkers!"

Emma snapped her fingers dramatically. "Drat, I'm a huge checkers player! I guess I'll have to play you two tomorrow." She winked at them mischievously. "I wonder if you guys could give me a good challenge."

"You're on!" Carl said, bumping his fist with Emma's.

"Alright you two," Carol said softly, nudging the two children. "Off to bed." Both kids pouted a little but plodded off towards their rooms. Emma grabbed her plate, planning on dropping it back off in the kitchen when Carol spoke again. "Did you have kids? You're very good with them."

Emma blinked. "No, uh, I wasn't married or anything." She knew that technically that was not a precursor, but her parents had raised her so that it would be. "I wasn't even all that good with kids, I don't think. The only time I tried to babysit I couldn't make the kid happy."

Carol looked at her curiously, as if she wanted to ask something, but instead she just said, "Tonight we might actually get to sleep peacefully."

Emma smiled a little. "I've got to admit, it is nice to not jolt awake five or six times night just to check the perimeter." Both women chuckled before parting ways.

Emma left the dish in the sink of the kitchen and started wandering the halls of the CDC. As a former journalist, this was pretty exciting for her to see. No matter how long you'd been in the business, no one got anywhere near the place to ask any questions or write any sort of expose'- even the good kind.

She found herself back in the large open room with all of the computers. She ran her hands over one of the keyboards as she looked at the huge screens on the wall. Who knew what sort of secrets this place hid…

"Please don't touch that." Emma jumped and whirled around to see Jenner walking down the walkway briskly. She backed away from the computer in a rush, as though she'd been snooping (and honestly she'd done that before, but in her defense she'd been on deadline and the source was not giving her anything work with).

"Sorry." She said sheepishly as Jenner sat down at a desk, looking over the boards carefully as though she'd been a toddler pounding on them. "This is just kinda surreal to me, being here."

Jenner raised an eyebrow. "That wasn't something I heard much of even when there were people around to say things. Were you an aspiring scientist or something?"

Emma laughed, a sheepish blush rising. "Not even close. I was a journalist." At the sarcastic grin on Jenner's face, she raised both hands in mock surrender. "I know I know, we're bloodthirsty sharks. But this bloodthirsty shark always wanted to get a tour of this place and tell people about all the good work you all were doing."

That wiped the look right off Jenner's face. "You believed we did good work?"

"Well, yeah." Emma said. "I mean, we've all heard about the anthrax weapons that other countries supposedly had stocked up. People who develop AIDs or smallpox are-were-relying on the work you do here." She paused, staring around at all the computers that probably hosted years worth of potentially life-saving information. "I don't know. As someone who technically has a incurable disease, it was nice to believe in a place where people were trying to cure things."

There was a pause before Jenner spoke. "It's been a long time since I've heard anyone say what we did here was good."

It wasn't a thank-you, per say, but Emma could hear a certain gratitude in his voice.

There was a clinking at the doorway, causing both Emma and Jenner to glance up. Rick was leaning in the doorway, half out of his police uniform and holding a bottle of wine.

"How's the blood?" He asked, walking into the room. Emma was both startled and amused that he was sort of staging in, not unlike Glenn earlier. She'd somehow pegged Rick as more of a prude.

"No surprises."

"I thought Glenn said that Daryl took the rest of the wine," Emma joked, snagging the bottle out of Rick's hands as he got closer and taking a long drink. She'd never been much of a drinker anyway, but she figured that now was as good a time as any for a little lapse in judgement.

Rick continued to stagger on, barely noticing the absence of the bottle. "I came to think you." He said, eyes a little over-bright. Emma narrowed her eyes, a little concerned about the normally calm and collected man.

"You did?" Jenner asked, sounding about as concerned as Emma was feeling.

Rick took another few steps and sort of buckled, falling down to sit with his back against one of the desks with a thud. He sort of sagged over then, just looking lost.

"Jeez Rick are you alright?" Emma knelt down next to him, putting the wine up on the desk as Jenner rolled over a bit. Rick was more drunk than Emma had realized, waving her off haphazardly and looking up at Jenner.

"You don't know what it's like out there," He said, a strained laugh tumbling from his lips. He looked over at Emma, who could see a deep, dark desperation hidden behind the alcohol-induced glaze. "You may think you do, but you don't. We'd have died out there."

Emma jerked back as though she'd been shocked. Back at the quarry, Rick had been so sure of his decisions so sure about keeping everyone alive that she'd decided to follow him. She'd believed because he'd said so. And now what, it had all been a lie? She cursed herself for putting that much trust in someone she didn't even know.

"It was only a matter of time." Rick continued, not missing the horrified look on Emma's face. "There's too many of those things. My boy, my wife, I never told them what I really thought. I never even hinted, just…just kept it in, kept us moving…" 

"It'll be okay," Jenner said uncharacteristically. His voice sounded wooden, but the look on his face was somehow brighter, as though he'd seen a light for the first time after many years of being lost in the dark. The look sent shivers down Emma's spine- she didn't know why, but she felt a sense of dread creeping into her skin.

"And they saw you." Rick rasped, grasping Emma's wrist. "They saw how hard it was for you. We had to keep going, but now can they see you in that much pain and believe me?"

Though she knew Rick was drunk and not really thinking about what he was saying, a boiling pit of heat grew in Emma's stomach. She was more than what she suffered from, and she hated those who tried to make it seem otherwise.

"Don't you put this on me!" She hissed, standing up so quickly that she knocked Rick back a little. "Don't put the fear of your wife and child on me and my problem. They were scared long before I showed up, they were probably scared long before you showed up!" Her chest was heaving with the furious need to shake some sense back into this boneheaded man. "It's not about being scared anymore, everyone is scared! It's about finding a way to keep going, even though you're scared, even though you're in pain! If you need to keep a strong, unbreakable exterior for your family then you go ahead and do that, do whatever you need to do. But don't think that I'm the reason they're scared! They don't need me for that!"

Both Jenner and Rick stared at her in shock- it occurred to Emma that it was probably the most either of them had heard her speak. But her nightmare was still fresh in her mind and she was tired decisions being made about her because of her body. After her outburst her body suddenly felt exhausted again, as though she'd run a mile instead of just shouting a bit.

Rick was trying to get to his feet and stumbling, making Emma roll her eyes. "Come on." She muttered, hoisting him up. "Let's get you back, fearless leader."

They'd almost made it back to Rick's room before he started talking. "I'm sorry." He said, accent a little heavier than usual. "I shouldn't have said-"

"No you shouldn't have." Emma said shortly. "What I'm going through is my problem, not your excuse." She sighed. "Look, I realize that being the guy everyone looks to can't be easy." Her voice was softer now, and Rick looked at her as she stopped outside the door. "But if you keep it all bottled up like that, one of these days you're going to lose it and get someone hurt. You need to be realistic with someone. And I'm not saying it needs to be your wife or your son, but if you keep lying to yourself and everyone else, it's going to eat you up on the inside."

"But if I lose it in front of them-" Rick started, but Emma shook her head.

"I'm just saying to be honest with someone you trust." She said. "You may be the leader, but you don't have to do it all by yourself. You can share the burden."


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's Note/ Disclaimer: **I am so, so sorry for how late this is! I've been trying to publish as soon as I have another chapter written, but I've had writer's block with both my stories over the past few weeks. It's been really annoying, I always have the first few sentences written and then I sit there for half an hour trying to write something else…hopefully the next few will come easier. For this story it hasn't been so bad because this particular episode, TS-19, was my absolute favorite from season 1- still get chills every time I watch it! So for disclaimer's sake, I do not own The Walking Dead (if I did the breaks between seasons wouldn't be nearly as long). Thanks to An Amber Pen and Paty S for reviewing my last chapter, and leave a review on your way out! Also, if you have time, please help me by taking the poll on my profile! (Also, Supernatural fans- see if you can catch the reference XD)

**Chapter Nine: **

Emma fell into an uneasy sleep after her confrontation with Rick, but it didn't last long (probably due to her earlier nap). The only person who was up before her the next morning (?) was T-Dog, who'd set himself up in the kitchen to make powdered eggs.

"You're up early," He said cheerfully as Emma walked in, stretching her arms above her head in a yawn.

"Yeah, the nap I took before actual bedtime really helped that," She said, smirking before digging around in the fridge. She was surprised that everything was still cold and potentially useable, so she dug out a package of bacon and turned on the stove.

"Damn that smells good." T-Dog said appreciatively, glancing over at the pan that was soon full of sizzling, greasy goodness. "Are we sure that we should eat that though? I mean who knows how the power's been working in here."

Emma just rolled her eyes. "I haven't had bacon since the world ended." She said, flipping the strands of meat. "And somehow, a slightly upset stomach beats the man-eating hoards outside. If there's bacon to fry, you'd better bet I"m going to eat it!"

She grinned and plucked out a smaller, already cooked piece and took a satisfied bite to prove her point.

T-Dog laughed. "All right then! Are the rest of us going to get any of that?"

"If you give me extra eggs, maybe I'll share." She said airily before winking and getting out a second package.

More of the group started filing in, drawn to the small of greasy goodness (despite T-Dog's insistence that they came for the eggs) and Jaquei started passing around water and orange juice. They also found a bottle of Ibprofen on the counter, courtesy of Dr. Jenner, which came in handy when Glenn wandered in, one hand over his eyes and groaning.

Emma couldn't help but smirk at the poor kid, but she took pity on him and guided him into a chair and slid a plate of eggs and bacon his way. "Eat up," she encouraged. "Nothing better for a hangover than a good, greasy breakfast." She narrowed her eyes playfully. "Though I used to go for a big, soaking hamburger served up in an ashtray."

Glenn gagged and laid his head down on the table, pushing the plate away from him. Emma chuckled and ruffled his hair before walking away to flip a couple more pieces of bacon in the pan.

"That was awful." Andrea said, eyeing Emma at the stove , who just shrugged.

"You get that drunk, you should be prepared for some good heckling in the morning." As Emma finished her second pan of bacon, Carol and Lori brought their kids into the kitchen and picked up some eggs from T-Dog.

"Morning guys," Emma greeted as they filed over to the stove. Carl and Sophia's eyes lit up at the sight of cooking meat in the pan.

"Can we have two pieces?" Carl asked eagerly, ignoring his mother's quiet rebuke of "Carl!"

Emma ruffled their hair and plopped two pieces on each plate. "There's plenty to go around, of course you can have two." She promised and the two scurried to seats at the table.

Carol followed, but Lori hung back for a moment. She stared at Emma, her gaze both accusing and slightly off, before following Carl back to the table. Emma turned back to the bacon stiffly, taking a piece for herself. What was that about?

Rick was one of the last to file in. Emma handed him his plate without looking at him and only gave a small nod in response to his 'thank you' before turning back to her own food.

"Are you hangout?" Carl asked his father curiously, breaking the small silence between him and Emma. "Mom said you would be."

"Well, Mom is right." Rick said, settling into the seat next to Carl, but the hangover was only part of his current headache. The other part was that he couldn't forget the hurt, angry look on Emma's face the previous night when he'd drunkenly attacked her physical wellbeing. He'd known it was unfair, but his drunk mind just spoke. He didn't actually believe she was a danger, at least not to them, not the way that he'd made it sound.

He did, however, take what she said to heart- he had to share his doubts with someone. But how could he tell Lori, Shane, or even Carl that he doubted their ability to survive?

"Ugh…never let me drink again." Glenn groaned, head in his hands as Emma smirked and passed him some Ibprofen and more orange juice.

"Not so fun the morning after, is it?" She teased, ruffling his hair again despite another groan and his attempts to swat her away.

The last member of the group, Shane, walked into the kitchen then.

"You feel as bad as I do?" Rick asked, probably teasing that they were both so late that morning.

"Worse." Shane said shortly, ignoring the pans of eggs and bacon and instead tossing back a glass of orange juice like it was a shot of alcohol.

"What the hell happened to you? Your neck?" T-Dog asked, making the entire group look up to the three long, red scratch marks that stretched down the man's neck. They didn't look too deep, but they were bright and irritated.

"I, uh, must've done it in my sleep." Shane excused, somewhat lamely.

"I've never seen you do that before," Rick noted.

"Me neither." Shane said darkly, and when Emma looked back towards the table, she realized he was staring intently at Lori, who looked as though she was doing everything she possibly could to avoid his gaze. "It's not like mea t all."

Immediately Emma was reminded of the discussion she'd accidentally overheard at the quarry, before she'd known that she'd be staying with these people

"_**-and you don't think I'm happy about that? He's my best friend."  
**_

"_**Why would you be? You are the one who told me that he died!" **_

Emma was jolted from her thoughts by Jenner entering the kitchen, waving slightly to the group. He poured himself a glass of juice before the quiet, peaceful breakfast was disturbed.

"Hey doc," Dale said hesitantly, "I don't mean to slam you with questions first thing-"

"But you will." Jenner said, smiling slightly.

"We didn't come here for the eggs." Andrea said bluntly. The rest of the group turned to face Jenner, varying expressions of hope crossing their faces.

Emma closed her eyes. When she had realized that there was only one surviving member of the CDC staff, she'd resigned herself to the undisclosed truth that there was no answer, no cure, no way out of this nightmare that was now real life. But looking around at the rest of the group, she kept her mouth shut. She knew how much they were relying on what Jenner said next. So as the doctor led the group back into the main computer bay, she kept her mouth closed and stayed near the back.

"Vi, pull up the playback of TS-19." Jenner called to his computer as the lights went up in the large room. Emma walked towards the large screen on the far wall and leaned towards it, resting her arms and elbows on the back of a desk.

"_Playback of TS-19." _

The screen lit up with a see-through human face before tilting horizontally and highlighting the inside of the human's head.

"Is that a brain?" Carl asked curiously.

Jenner smiled slightly at the boy. "An extraordinary one." Then his face dimmed, as if a candle had been blown out behind his face. "Not that it matters, in the end." He seemed to shake himself before asking the computer for an EIV, an enhanced internal view of the brain. Immediately lights began dancing across the screen in wild, random patterns. Emma couldn't help but drop her mouth a little in awe.

"What are those lights?" Shane asked.

"It's a person's life." Jenner said simply. "Experiences, memories, it's everything. Somewhere in all that wiring, all those ripples of light, all those random signals, is you- everything that makes you unique. And human."

The group stared in wonder at the little lights before Daryl broke in with, "You don't make sense ever?"

Emma rolled her eyes a bit at his sarcasm. "They're our brains' communication centers." She threw out, holding on to information she'd once picked up for a story on sleep patterns and dreaming. "It's how our brains sends messages to different parts of the body."

Jenner nodded approvingly. "They're electric impulses tin the brain that carry all the messages. They determine everything that a person says, does, or thinks, from the moment of birth to the moment of death."

"Death?" Rick said, straightening and walking to Jenner. "That's what this is, a vigil?"

"Yes." Jenner said. "Or, rather, the playback of the vigil."

"This person died?" Andrea asked, voice cracked, and Emma could tell that all she was seeing was her sister's face.

"Yes. This is someone who was bitten and infected, and volunteered to have us record the process."

The computer jumped ahead in time, and the glowing lights in the brain started to be overtaken at the stem by darkness. It almost looked like poison, chocking off the healthy, glowing brain.

"What is that?" Glenn asked incredulously.

"It invades the brain like meningitis." Jenner explained, gesturing up at the image. "The adrenal glands hemorrhage, the brain goes into shutdown, and then the major organs."

The face ont he screen was squirming, mouth opening and closing as if gasping for air, probably overheating from the fever. Emma crossed her arms, holding herself until the entire brain went black and the body stopped moving.

"Then death." Jenner said quietly. "Everything you ever were or ever will be, just…gone."

"Is that what happened to Jim?" Sophia asked in a small voice. Emma heard her mother quietly agree before everyone took their own deep breaths. Andrea turned away from the screen and took a few steps, sitting down in a desk next to Emma. In a rare moment of empathy, Emma put a hand on her shoulder.

"She lost someone two days ago." Lori said quietly. "Her sister."

"I've lost someone too, I know how devastating it is," Jenner said, almost directly to Andrea. Emma closed her eyes and heard the shrieks and cries of Crawford echoed.

"We've all lost people." She said, staring at Jenner, who nodded slowly. She withdrew her hand from Andrea's shoulder and crossed her arms again as Jenner ordered the computer to scan to the next event.

A red spark moved up the brain stem, followed by several more, never moving further into the brain than just past the stem. The body began to jerk and twitch before making the gasping motions of a Walker.

"It restarts the brain?" Lori asked incredulously.

"You tell me." Jenner said, gesturing to the screen.

"No." Emma said quietly. "It's not the same. It's just…dark. The person is gone."

Jenner nodded. "The resurrection times vary greatly, anywhere from three minutes to either hours. In this patient's case it was two hours, one minute, seven seconds. It only restarts the brain stem, gets them up and moving."

"But they're not alive?" Rick clarified. "It's nothing like before." 

Jenner sighed heavily. "The frontal lob, the neocortex, the human part- that doesn't come back. The you part. It's just a shell, driven by minds instinct."

As quickly as the person- Walker- had started moving again, a line shot through it onscreen. Emma realized that they'd shot the test subject, ending their second 'life'.

If nothing else, at least the Walkers weren't suffering, she told herself. Once you were gone, your pain was over. Your body just started walking around again after you left it.

Once the video was over, Jenner powered down the area and almost walked away.

"You have no idea what it is, do you?" Andrea accused.

Jenner turned back, meeting her gaze and Emma's over her shoulder. "It could be microbial. Viral. Parasitic. Fungal."

"Or the wrath of God?" Jaquei asked, almost sarcastically.

"There is that." Jenner acknowledged.

"Somebody must know something! Somebody, somewhere!" Andrea said, and Carol asked about any other facilities around.

"There may be some."

Rick looked incredulous. "But you don't know? How can you not know?!"

"Everything went down. Communications, all of it." Jenner said. "I've been in the dark for almost a month."

His voice, calm and cool, was starting to worry Emma. Sure, he may have had more time with the idea, but she couldn't understand how he could be so calm in the face of their entire way of life dying. Something didn't feel right- about this, about him.

"So it's not just here." Andrea said dismissively. ""There's nothing left anywhere. Nothing. That's what you're really saying, isn't it?"

Jenner had nothing to say to that, which said everything the group needed to hear. They let that sink in- there was no cute, and no one left to look for one. There was nothing to look for.

"Man, I'm gonna get shit-faced drunk, again." Daryl muttered.

Honestly, Emma couldn't even blame him.


	10. Chapter 10

**Author's Note/Disclaimer: **Firstly, I would like to extend my apology for the late arrival of this chapter. Between finals week, two jobs moving into a new house, I haven't had time to write or update (or breathe, actually) so this chapter has been delayed for far longer than it should have been. I hope that now it's summer, my updates will come more frequently! I'd also like to take this time to extend a second apology- after my last chapter I received a review that pointed out I had been calling Morales and his family Mexican. This was insensitive of me and I apologize to both Guest (who made the comment) and to anyone else I may have offended by doing so. I went back and rephrased my words (I only found two instances where I said this, before Emma learned his name) and I have taken down the comment, not because I am ashamed of it but because I would have preferred to apologize for it directly with those who were offended. I'd like to thank Paty S, An Amber Pen and tatyasdias for their reviews, and please, if anyone has something they'd like to say about this story or if they have any concerns, don't hesitate to voice them. That being said, I do not own The Walking Dead, and I hope that you enjoy this chapter.

**Chapter Ten: **

As the group struggled with the weight of knowledge that had been thrust upon them, Dale stepped forward to break the silence.

"Doctor, I know this has been taxing for you, and I hate to ask one more question," He said, walking towards a blinking red clock in the corner of the room. "But that clock- it's counting down. What happens at zero?"

Emma glanced up and realized Dale was right. She had no idea what time it was- she wasn't even keeping track of days anymore, let alone hours- but this clock was ticking down, currently at **00:01:00:00**.

What happened in one hour?

Jenner was standing closer to her so she looked over at him, but he suddenly seemed to be avoiding all eye contact. "The basement generators, uh, they run out of fuel."

Emma noticed how Jenner's voice changed, how he started walking away. It seemed that Rick noticed too. "And then?" He asked, and Jenner just kept going. Rick turned towards the big screen, looking for someone to talk to. "Vi, what happened when the power runs out?"

"When the power runs out, facility-wide decontamination will occur."

"Decontamination?" Lori asked, looking to Rick. "What does that mean?"

Rick, Shane, Glenn and T-Dog all gathered together, looking for the door to the basement generators. The way Jenner had just left made them all shaky and worried, and they had to know what was going on. As they headed for the basement, Emma grabbed Rick's arm.

"I think we need to go." She said in a hushed voice. "I think we need to get everyone paced up and go."

"We don't know what this is yet." Rick said, glancing back at the door. "We don't know it's a problem."

"The computer said 'decontamination'." Emma hissed. "You know what this place is, all the things it could have been contaminated with! What do you think decontamination means to them?!"

"We aren't leaving until we know something's wrong!" Rick said forcefully, glancing around at the group. "Just go back to the rooms with the others, we'll figure this out." With that, he turned on his heel and walked away with the group towards the basement.

Emma huffed, but followed the rest of the group back to the housing units. She started rummaging through her room, cramming anything that might have been useful into her knapsack. She did manage to find a first aid kit and a few good blankets, but most of it was pretty useless. She crammed what she could into the bag and slung it over her shoulder. As she did, there was a knock on the door. She opened it to find Carl and Sophia, grinning and holding a checkers board.

"You said you would play with us!" Carl said eagerly before he noticed the bag on her shoulder. "Where are you going?"

Emma bit her lip and then the sound changed in the room. It was barely noticeable, but the soft, white noise of the air conditioner suddenly disappeared. It may have meant nothing at all. "But with everything that had happened that morning, with all the tension and underlying fear running through her, Emma was not prepared to stay and risk herself, or the people who were starting to become her group, on one person's hunch.

"Your dad wants us to get our stuff together." She said, clapping both kids on their shoulder. "We need to get ready to leave. Go get your stuff, okay?"

Sophia ran to her room right away but Carl hesitated, looking back at Emma. "Dad wants us to go?" He asked, obviously torn. "I thought this place was safe?"

"I don't think that it is, Carl." Emma said gently. "And we really shouldn't take that chance." She clapped his shoulder and followed him back to his room, where Lori had just taken notice of the loss of air conditioning.

"What's going on?" She asked, almost suspiciously, as Carl started piling his books back into a bag.

"We need to pack up and go," Emma said, sticking her head out into the hallway. Everyone was starting to poke their heads out, commenting that the air and lights were going off. This did nothing to alleviate Emma's tension. "Right now, we need to go right now."

"Rick hasn't said anything about leaving." Lori said, folding her arms and narrowing her eyes at Emma, who was quickly growing irritated. "We're not leaving if he doesn't think it's a good idea."

"Trust me, staying here is a bad idea!" Emma snapped. "You heard the computer, in less than an hour this place is going to be decontaminated- I don't think we want to be around to find out what that entails!" She saw Lori glance at Carl, worry in her gaze, and she sighed. "If you care about your son at all, you will get your stuff and you will leave."

Emma turned on her heel and went back out into the hall, where Jenner (neatly dressed in a pressed shirt, tie and lab coat) was walking towards the computer room, ignoring the questions bring fired at him.

"Jenner, what's happening?" She snapped, following behind him. "Why's everything going off?"

"Energy is being prioritized." Jenner said as if he barely noticed her, snagging a wine bottle from Daryl's hand as he passed by.

"Air isn't a priority? And lights?" Dale asked in confusion.

"It's not up to me." Jenner said, taking a swig of the wine. "Zone 5 is shutting itself down." As he finished speaking, the lights in the main hallway started flickering out. A hand grabbed the back of Emma's shirt, causing her to look back at Carl, whose eyes were big and fearful.

"What the hell does that mean?!" Daryl called, storming after Jenner. "Hey I'm talking to you!"

"Who cares what he means?" Emma said forcefully, attracting everyone's attention. "Let's just get our stuff and go!"

The group had followed Jenner out onto a catwalk, under which Rick and the men who'd been attempting to investigate the problem were running. Lori called to him over the side, and Rick just held up a hand to her and stomped to Jenner.

"Jenner, what's happening?" He hissed, eyes falling on Emma and Carl just behind him, both with their bags. He met Emma's gaze, both accusing and thankful, and she held it, setting her jaw tightly. She would not apologize for trying to keep people safe.

Jenner kept walking, the group trailing along behind him, fear heightening with every word out of his mouth. "The system is dropping all the nonessential uses of power. It's designed to keep the computers running to the last possible second. That started as we approached the half hour mark." He glanced up at the ticking clock on the wall, nodding. "Right on schedule."

**30:31:28. **

Carl's hand fisted Emma's shirt even tighter, and she started breathing heavily. The group stared around trying to figure out what was happening, but Emma could feel the weight of death hanging over them all.

"It was the French."

Jenner spoke almost directly to Andrea, eyes staring but not really seeing.

"They were the last ones to hold out, as far as I know. While our people were bolting out the doors and committing suicide in the hallways, they stayed in the labs till the end. They thought they were close to a solution."

"What happened?" Jaquei asked.

"The same thing that's happening here." Jenner said sardonically, his smile dark. "No power grid. Ran out of juice. The world runs on fossil fuel, I mean, how stupid is that?"

Shane, clearly fed up with the riddles, launched himself up the steps towards Jenner. "Let me tell you-"

"To hell with it Shane, I don't even care!" Rick said, grabbing his friend's arm. "Lori, grab our things. Everyone get your stuff, we're getting out of here now!"

Emma raced towards the door- she'd wanted since she'd seen that dumb clock- but just as she reached it, an alarm started blaring and red lights flashed. This made everyone pause, and while her back was turned, the door to the rest of the facility slide up and locked in place.

"No." Emma whispered before slamming herself against the door, terrified. "What the hell! Let us out!"

Rick had raced up behind her, and when Emma turned back their eyes met. Only, unlike last time, there was no anger- only fear.

"Did you just lock us in?" Glenn asked, voice rising high. "He just locked us in!"

Emma kept throwing herself against the door, almost desperately now. "No, no!" She kept muttering. "No! Not now, not here!"

"You son of a bitch!" Daryl shouted, racing towards Jenner and forcing him out of his chair. "You locked us in here!"

"No stop!" Shane started shoving him backwards, helped by T-Dog.

"Jenner, open that door now." Rick said, voice deadly calm as he walked towards the doctor. Emma took a few steps away from the door, watching the scene with wide eyes.

"There's no point."

Emma's breath hitched. "What does that mean?" She said, trying to keep her voice from shaking.

"Everything topside is locked down." Jenner said. "The emergency exits are sealed."

"Well open the damn things!" Dale exclaimed.

"That's not something I control. The computers do." Jenner said calmly. "I told you once that front door closed, it wouldn't open agin. You heard me say that."

"You didn't tell us that we'd never get out!" Emma yelled, marching down the catwalk towards the group. "You didn't tell us we'd be forcibly locked in!"

"It's better this way." Jenner said, almost placatingly, as if anything he said could make this better.

"What is?!" Rick said, leaning over the doctor. "What happens in 28 minutes?!"

Jenner just turned away, typing into the computer again. Shane shoved his shoulder roughly and got in his face. "What happens in 28 minutes?!"

"**Do you know what this place is?!"** Jenner yelled, composure finally breaking. **"We protected the public from some ****VERY ****NASTY ****STUFF****!"** He pointed at Emma. **"Ask the reporter! Tell them the stuff we used to test here!"**

"Anthrax." Emma whispered. "Weaponized small pox. Ebola strains from Africa."

"That is stuff you don't want getting out, **EVER**." Jenner's voice had lessened slightly after Emma's announcement, but the group was still shell-shocked. Emma was taking deep breaths, trying to stay calm. Jenner slid back into his seat, running a hand over his face.

"In the event of a catastrophic power failure- in a terrorist attack, for example- HITs are deployed to prevent any organisms from getting out."

"HITs?" Rick asked?

Jenner just looked up at them. "Vi, define."

"_HITs: high-impulse thermobaric fuel-air explosives consist of a two-stage aerosol ignition that produces a blast wave of significantly greater power and duration than any other known explosive except nuclear. The vacuum-pressure effect ignites the air between 5000º and 6000º and is usefully when the greatest loss of life and damage to structures is desired." _

As the computer was talking, Emma felt all the air leave her lungs. The group all looked lost, completely out of their depth. Rick hugged Lori and Carl close to him, Carol was curled around Sophia, T-Dog was holding Jaquei. Emma ran a hand over her face, unsure how to process what seemed to be impending death. It was all over…like this?

"It sets the air on fire." Jenner said softly, almost hypnotically. "No pain. An end to sorrow, grief, regret. Everything."

The moment was broken by Daryl throwing the wine bottle against the locked door. "Open the damn door!" He screamed, causing Emma to jump and shake herself. The men started charging the door with axes, and Emma looked back at the clock.

**00:11:41.**

Oh God. Less than 15 minutes. She ran a hand through her hair and looked at the children desperately, who were huddled with their mothers and crying.

"You should have left well enough alone." Jenner said. "It would've been so much easier."

"Easier for who?!" Lori shrieked.

"All of you." Jenner said. "You know what's out there- a short brutal life and an agonizing death." He looked at Emma, standing next to Andrea. "Your sister, what was her name?"

"Amy." Andrea whispered.

Jenner nodded before focusing on Emma. "And you, your condition. You know what's at the end of your road, when you have a debilitating affliction. You know it can't end well."

Emma let out an incredulous, horrified breath of air. "Are you kidding me?" She asked, her voice low. "You're telling me that you are forcing me to choose death because I'm already dead?! You unbelievable, complete and utter _ASSHOLE_!" She went to charge the doctor but Glenn and Rick ran to hold her back.

"_I AM NOT DEAD_!" She screamed, drawing everyone's eyes to her. "_NONE OF US ARE DEAD! YOU CAN'T JUST TAKE AWAY OUR CHOICES LIKE YOU KNOW HOW THIS STORY WILL END_!"

"You know what this does. You've seen it." Jenner said soothingly as Glenn and Rick grasped Emma's arms to hold her in place and not beat his head in. He looked at Rick. "Is that really what you want for your wife and son?"

"I don't want **this**." Rick said emphatically.

Daryl kept banging the axe against the locked door. Jenner just shook his head. "Those doors were designed to withstand a rocket launcher."

"Well your head ain't!" Daryl growled, raising the axes and charging towards Jenner. Dale and Shane and T-Dog stopped him, though Emma wished that either Glenn or Rick had helped. Then she could do the job herself.

"But you do want this!" Jenner said, walking towards Rick. "Last night you said you knew it was just a matter of time before everybody you loved was dead."

"What?" Lori asked, staring at Rick almost in betrayal.

"You really said that?" Shane asked, glaring at Rick. "After all your big talk?"

Emma shoved Glenn off her. "I had to keep hope alive, didn't I?" Rick asked.

"Don't blame Rick." Emma said, glaring at Jenner. "Blame the guy that thinks he knows better than us what is good for us!" She stomped towards Jenner, noticing Glenn following close behind. "You can't decide our lives for us! If we still have hope for this life, you don't get to decide to take that away from us!"

"But there is no hope." Jenner insisted. "There never was."

"There is always hope!" Rick retaliated. "Maybe it won't be with you, maybe not here, but somebody, somewhere-!"

"What part of 'everything is gone' do you not understand?" Andrea asked dully from her place on the floor.

Jenner nodded, pointing at her. "Listen. She gets it. This is what takes us down."

"This is our extinction event."


	11. Chapter 11

**Author's Note/ Disclaimer: **I do not own The Walking Dead. I would never kill anyone off and it would get pretty boring really quickly. Sadly, I have reached the end of episode TS-19, which is one of my favorites, but on the positive side that means we're starting season 2 next chapter! I'm slowly getting back into the habit of writing, so between this and my Criminal Minds story, I should be better at updating! I'm in that awful branch of life when all the shows I watch are gearing up for their next season, so once I catch up on the two I have to finish, I will be extremely upset and in need of a project, and this is a good fallback! I make two references to animes in this chapter, see if you can spot them! Thanks to An Amber Pen for reviewing my last chapter, and I hope you all enjoy and review this next chapter!

**Chapter Eleven: **

Daryl kept pounding on the locked door like a wild animal while everyone else just looked lost. Lori and Carol had sunk to the floor, holding their children, both of whom were sobbing. Carl looked up from his mom's arms with tears streaming down his face.

Emma wanted to comfort him and Sophia. She wanted to tell them that everything would be okay, that they wouldn't die in here, trapped like rats. She wanted to, but she didn't want to lie to them, and she didn't know if this would be a lie.

"This isn't right." Carol said, voice cracking around the words as she tried to cover every visible inch of her daughter. "You can't just keep us here!"

Jenner leaned forward in his seat, eyes gentle and voice soft, like a patient father telling his child not to be scared, that there are no monsters under the bed or in the closet.

The explosion wouldn't hurt, not at all.

"One tiny moment, a millisecond, no pain."

"My daughter doesn't deserve to die like this!"

Jenner looked legitimately confused, like he couldn't understand why they were upset. "Wouldn't it be kinder, more compassionate, to just hold your loved ones and wait for the clock to run down?"

"How is that better?!" Emma snarled, voice cracking. "How is it better to watch the clock, bracing yourself for the fire you know is coming?"

She could have gone on but she was interrupted by the sound of a gun cocking. Shane had grabbed a shotgun and was walking steadily towards Jenner, eyes both calm and manic all at once. Rick and the other men went after him, trying to haul him away like they had with Daryl, but he walked right up to Jenner and stuck the gun in his face. To his credit, Jenner didn't even flinch.

"Brother, this is not the way you do this!" Rick insisted. "We will never get out of here!" Lori jumped in, Rick kept talking and Shane seemed to lose it, screaming and shooting a computer terminal. Rick grabbed the gun and forced Shane to the ground, standing over him and breathing heavily. "Are you done now?"

Shane glared up at him. "Yeah, I guess we all are."

Rick handed the gun off to T-Dog and Emma almost saw the life go out of the group. They all stared at each other, Shane's words echoing in their minds.

"No." Emma said, shaking her head furiously, breaking the silence. "No, we're not done." She rounded on Jenner. "You know what? Maybe you're the majority in this new world and maybe I'm the minority but I  would rather risk today's certain exit for tomorrow's uncertain future because it means that we have a chance. It means that no matter what, people are not over, we're still going and that means that our future can change, cure or no cure!"

She bit her lip and kept glaring at Jenner. "Our lives are not over, so you don't get to tell us that they are."

Rick stepped up next to her, putting a hand on her shoulder for a moment before walking towards Jenner himself. "I think you're lying."

"What?" Jenner asked.

"You're lying about no hope." Rick said, sounding more sure of himself than he was probably feeling, but that probably came with being an officer. "If that were true you would have bolted with the rest, or taken the easy way out. But you didn't. You chose the hard path. Why?"

Jenner shook his head. "It doesn't matter."

"Of course it matters, it always matters!" Emma growled. Rick threw her a cautioning look before turing back to the doctor.

"You stayed when others ran." He said, urgent but quietly, eerily calm. "Why?"

"Not because I wanted to." Jenner said through gritted teeth, finally glaring back at Rick and breaking the calm composure he'd possessed until now. "I made a promise-" He stood up and pointed towards the large screen where, just hours before, they'd watched a person become a Walker, "-to her. My wife."

All eyes shot to Jenner, a stunned silence filling the air. "Test subject 19 was your wife?" Lori asked.

"She begged me to keep going as long as I could." He said, raising his arms in defeat. "How could I say no? She was dying." He pointed at the screen, this time angry, but Emma could see that it was directed inwards. "It should've been me on that table. I wouldn't have mattered to anybody, she was a loss to the world! Hell, she ran this place, I just worked here! In our field, she was an Einstein! Me? I'm just…Edwin Jenner. She could have done something about this. Not me."

"Your wife didn't have a choice." Rick said, pleading with the man. "You do. That's all we want- a choice, a chance!"

Jenner looked at Rick appraisingly before turning his eyes on Emma. "Is that what you think?"

Emma nodded. "Just let us try for as long as we can." She said. "Every human has that right, and even now, no one has the right to take that away from us."

Everyone waited with baited breath as Jenner turned back to his computer. "I told you, topside's locked down. I can't open those." Then he started typing on his keyboard, causing the others to look up. After scanning a card, the locked doors slid open.

"Come on!" Daryl called, waving the group towards the exit, Glenn leading people up the catwalk.

Emma felt all the strength leave her legs in relief, but she forced herself to stagger up from her spot towards Jenner. "Thank you." She said hoarsely.

"We're grateful for the chance." Rick added.

Jenner just smiled, but the smile was dark, hinting at something evil and dangerous. "The day will come when you won't be." He moved to shake Rick's hand and them pulled him close, whispering into his ear.

Emma hesitated, watching the expression on Rick's face change from confusion to disbelief, to pure horror. She was about to step forward and separate them, when Glenn grabbed ahold of her arm. Lori and Carl raced down the walk as well, Lori to Rick and Carl gripping the back of Emma's shirt. "We've got four minutes, let's go!"

Carl tugged on her shirt insistently, breaking Emma's concentration. She shook herself and followed Carl and his parents back up the catwalk. They passed T-Dog who was gripping Jaquei's arm, only for her to push him away.

"No, I'm staying." She said, stepping back down the walk towards Jenner. "I'm staying sweetie."

"But that's insane!" T-Dog hissed, eyes wide.

"It's perfectly sane." Jaquei said. "For the first time in a long time. I'm not ending up like Jim and Amy." She smiled tearfully at the group, continuing to step back. "There's no time to argue, and no point, not if you want to get out." She pushed T-Dog back towards the door before walking all the way back to Jenner, arms folded in determination.

T-Dog looked like he was about to run back after her, but Shane grabbed his arm and pulled him away. Emma pushed Carl in front of her after his parents, leaving her and Dale on the catwalk looking out to Andrea, Jenner and Jaquei. "I'm staying too." Andrea said, voice calm and sure of herself.

"Andrea no!" Dale protested, looking back at Emma in desperation. "Help me!"

Emma looked at Andrea. The blonde woman wasn't even looking back at them, just leaned against a desk on the floor.

"It's her choice, Dale." Emma said quietly. She could hardly preach choice and then take Andrea's away from her.

She turned back up the catwalk and ran after the others, dashing up the stairs towards the front doors. Glenn and T-Dog started throwing themselves at the doors, but when they wouldn't open (like Jenner had said) the group turned their attention to the floor-to-ceiling windows. Emma vaguely registered that the sun was out, rather than being night like she'd originally thought. How could it be so bright and sunny at a moment like this?

Daryl tossed her one of the axes and they started hacking at the windows while T-Dog took out his frustration with a chair. They barely scratched them, however. Shane loaded up an assault rifle and shot the glass, but it barely cracked it.

"Son of a bitch!" Emma hissed, trying to crack the spot Shane had already shot, hoping it would be weaker, but nothing changed.

"Rick, I have something that might help!" Carol called, digging around in her bag.

"Carol, I don't think a nail file is going to do it." Shane said, causing Emma to roll her eyes and continue hacking away at the window, throwing a few kicks in as well.

Carol kept talking. "Your first morning in camp, when I washed your uniform, I found this in your pocket."

Emma kept hacking at the window, but Rick hopped up next to her with a grenade, telling everyone to get down. She stared at him, eyes wide, as he took a deep breath and pulled the pin. Immediately he grabbed her arm and pulled her off the ledge towards the others. "Oh sh—-!"

The grenade blew as they jumped. Emma landed hard on her arms, gasping as the heat wave rolled off her back and her elbows stung. But she didn't have time to nurse herself- Rick yanked her back to her feet, toward the broken window, out onto the lawn. She regained herself as her feet hit the grass and she saw the Walkers heading their way. She ran ahead, standing in front of Sophia and Carol, and pulled out her gun, shooting their way to the vehicles.

Once a path had been cleared she piled into the RV behind Rick and his family and Glenn. Lori and Rick climbed into the front to start the engine, leaving Carl to curl up in Emma's arms. He was shaking so Emma smoothed his hair down instinctively. "It's alright," She whispered, looking out the window at the building, once a symbol of hope, now a symbol of terror. How much time did they have left?!

"Wait look!"

Emma let out a surprised breath as Andrea and Dale climbed out of the window. "He did it." She whispered. He'd saved Andrea. She bit her lip, silently urging them to move faster. "Rick?!" She asked, seeing the man check his watch.

"Ten seconds." He whispered. "Get down!" He stuck his head out the window and started honking wildly. "Dale get down!"

The group crawled to the back, Rick and Glenn curing themselves over Lori and Emma. Carl was still wrapped in Emma's arms. She put her hands over his ears, hoping to shield them slightly from the blast. "It's okay." She whispered, though whether it was to Carl or to herself, she didn't know.

She felt the blast before she even heard it. The heat dried her throat, parching the air. The crumbling of the building echoed behind her and she felt the RV shake as pieces of the concrete smacked against the roof. Carl gripped her arms tightly and whimpered.

Then, as quickly as it had started, it was over. Silence fell outside the RV, causing the group to peek their heads up cautiously. Emma handed Carl off to his mother and followed Rick to the front of the RV. The fire was burning strong, making the air shimmer between them and the buildings, smoking billowing high into the air. Emma saw Dale and Andrea had curled up behind a barricade, carefully sticking their heads up to assess the danger. She and Rick shared a wide-eyed glance, breathing heavily.

Ten seconds later, and they all would have been dead.

They didn't have time to dwell; Glenn was ruing Dale and Andrea into the RV and Rick was putting them in gear. With a few last glances at what was almost their tomb, the line of cars drove in a quick U-turn to get as far away as possible from the smoke and flames.

Emma leaned against the wall, closing her eyes, holding her knapsack like a security blanket, but she didn't know if anything could make her feel safe anymore.


	12. Chapter 12

**Author's Note/Disclaimer: **I do not own The Walking Dead. I am, however, really excited for it to come back in a couple of weeks! Rick looks like he's going of the deep end (even more than he did the last time) so that'll be fun to figure into this story! I'm sorry the wait has been so long, I promise I'm trying to do better. Thanks to An Amber Pen for reviewing my last chapter, and I'd really love to see some more feedback on this story, even if it's just to yell at me for taking so long to update! I'd like to know if there's anything you guys would like me to include or something you think I am overlooking! So we're in that awkward deleted scene between seasons 1 and 2, but by the end of the next chapter we will be completely in season 2, so we're almost at the farm! Read, review and enjoy guys!

**Chapter Twelve: **

They had only driven a little ways through Atlanta when Daryl started honking wildly. Rick looked back to see what was going on, but the truck was blocking his line of sight. Emma shook herself and hoisted open one of the windows to stick her head out. The sight that greeted her sent a chill through her veins like ice. "Shit!"

"What's going on back there?!" Rick called, trying to keep his voice calm so he didn't scare Carl.

"It's the Walkers from the CDC." She called back. "They're still on our tail!" 

Rick swore under his breath. They should have lost these guys awhile back, they'd have if they'd been living people!

Emma turned back to meet Rick's eyes, silently asking what to do. That was answered for her by a skidding noise and a yell. Emma stuck her head back out of the window to see Shane had sharply turned to avoid the pack on his tail and blown a tire. "Oh shit!" She grabbed her gun and leapt out of the RV.

"Emma!" Carl screamed, echoed by Rick and Glenn as he pulled the RV to a stop, but Emma kept running towards Shane, cursing the hoard behind him before raising her gun and shooting. Shane grabbed the bags in the seat next to him an chis gun, rolling out and dashing back towards Emma.

"Hope you didn't have anything sentimental in there, because I am not going back to get it!" She called, not looking towards him as she started shooting next to her.

"It's like these things don't even get tired!" He yelled back, swearing as he nailed a Walker staggering towards them slightly ahead of the rest. "Dammit we don't have enough ammo for this!"

Emma bit her lip, trying to figure out a plan, an opening, anything that didn't end up with her getting chewed on by lumbering dead things. She and Shane were slowly walking backwards, trying to keep any Walkers from getting around behind them, but there were just so many…

Help arrived in the form of a wild, smelly redneck who rode his bike right between the Walkers, Emma and Shane, honking his little horn and yelling like a crazy person. "COME ON YOU SONS OF BITCHES!" He yelled, speeding off and causing the Walkers to pause before most started trailing after him.

Emma took the opportunity to grab Shane's shoulder and jerk him back towards the RV, which they took off towards in a dead sprint, the large bad of weapons jangling off Shane's shoulder. The RV slammed into gear and three Walkers just beyond it turned their rotting, mutilated faces to the two humans running their way. Emma pulled her handgun out and shot two before falling into the open door, Glenn grabbing her arms and pulling her farther in so that Shane could follow her and slam the door as Rick revved up the engine and sped away.

Out of immediate danger, Emma let her head fall back against the floor. Glenn took his hat off and smacked her in the face lightly. "You scared the hell out of me!" He scolded, but his voice was full of relief. Emma just smirked, eyes shut, before letting out an "omph!" as the weight of a twelve-year-old boy plopped onto her lap.

Apparently he had jumped from Shane onto her, if the look the other man was giving her was anything to go on. As Carl squeezed her, Emma noticed that Lori was looking back at them, her face tense and disapproving, though her eyes were roaming from Emma to Shane and back again, as if she couldn't decide which person Carl was hugging she was more uncomfortable with. So Emma nudged the boy up gently. "We're good, kid." She said, smiling reassuringly at him. "Why don't you go back up to your Mom and Dad, okay?" Carl nodded and crawled back into his mother's arms.

"Rick, these things may be slow, but they don't tire, man." Shane said, pressing his forehead into his hand. "They just keep coming."

"Good to know." Rick said, sighing heavily.

"That's all on Daryl," Emma said grudgingly. "He's the one who noticed first."

"Yeah, and started honking like a maniac," Dale joked, coaxing a weak laugh from the group. Emma could see Carol and T-Dog's cars ahead of them, but she couldn't see Daryl's bike. She glanced over at Dale, who nodded towards the rear of the RV. He was okay.

After the laughter died down and Emma and Shane had caught their breaths, they all glanced at each other. "Rick, you got any moves left?" Shane asked.

"I've got one." Rick admitted.

Shane rubbed his forehead. "Is it any good?"

Rick shrugged. "It occurs to me that we have friends in this town. Glenn, what do you think?"

Glenn's eyes lit up immediately. "Yeah!"

"Wait, we do?" Emma said, craning her neck back to look at the kid.

Glenn nodded eagerly. "Yeah, when we went into town to pick up all the guns, we met Guillermo- he and a bunch of guys are taking care of a bunch of old people from a retirement home. I mean, they kidnapped me for a little while and pointed a bunch of guns at us, but they're cool!"

"They kidnapped you?!" Emma reiterated slowly before throwing Rick an incredulous glance. "Um, I'm sold?"

"They're good people." Rick said reassuringly. "They were just trying to protect their group. It will buy us some time at least, a night or two until we figure out what we're doing."

Dale looked about as convinced as Emma felt. "The men who held you hostage doesn't exactly fill me with confidence."

"You weren't there!" Glenn said confidently. "You didn't see how Rick handled it. They're our friends!"

That was the end of the conversation, Glenn left grinning ear to ear, but Emma wasn't so sure. They'd used _that_ phrase again: 'just trying to protect their group'. She knew they didn't realize how dangerous that could be. That had been all Crawford wanted to do, at first. Until-

'No.' She thought to herself, shaking her head sharply. 'I'm not going back there. Crawford is DONE. I'm out.'

She leaned back and closed her eyes as the traveling line of cars made their way to an outskirt neighborhood. When they pulled to a stop, Rick, Daryl and Glenn took the leading walking.

"These people are barely holding on…what makes you think they'll take us in?" Andrea asked, a certain amount of disbelief in her voice.

"With all the guns we gave them, they'll probably throw us a party." Rick pointed out.

Emma raised her eyebrows, but stayed quiet and covered the rear of the group. She stared around, trying to spot any sign of the living or the undead, ready to run out of there at any sign of trouble. She cared about this group, she really did, but the CDC had made her think about things. She'd had a gut feeling and it had ended up being right, and the group- well, Rick- had shot her down. She knew he'd wanted to believe there was a safe place for him and his family, she wanted a safe place too. But she also knew that waiting in an unsafe place for something better could get you killed. If this was going to become a pattern, she needed to know.

And she needed to leave.

The group hopped over a ledge, Emma going last, and everyone who was armed swung their guns around. There was no one around, which seemed odd, especially when Glenn asked about lookouts. Emma's grip tightened on her weapon and she took a deep breath before rounding a corner.

The side yard had at least four walkers munching on fallen bodies. Some were so torn into that they didn't even have features anymore, just muscle and sinew. Emma snarled as Shane swore, and she moved farther up in the group so that she was standing in front of the mothers and children.

One of the Walkers noticed them, raising its head from the elderly woman it had been snowing on. That attracted the attention of the others, some still with meat stuck in their teeth, and Rick shook his head. "To hell with the noise."

Emma took that as a cue, raised her gun, and started firing.

_**TWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWD**_

The group made it to the top floor, where they found more bodies, blood smeared down the walls where they'd fallen. Sophia started whimpering, causing Daryl to start hissing at her to shut up.

"Put a sock in it or I will!"

"Leave her alone, she's just a kid!" Emma hissed back, showing past the families to push Daryl back. He just scoffed and turned away while Emma sniffed haughtily. The men started moving along the hall, checking rooms for any Walkers, while Emma started looking for any empty rooms. About halfway down she found a room that had a bit of blood spatter in one corner but no bodies. She stuck her head back out ingot he hall and whistled, jerking her head into the room when the mothers caught her eye. Lori and Carol shepherded the kids inside where they slid down on the wall, covering their noses.

Emma wrinkled hers as well. The whole building smelled like decomp.

She slung her rifle over their shoulder and holstered her handgun before half stepping into the hallway. Rick was already handing out assignments.

"We hunker down for the night. Shane and Daryl, sweep the building, make sure we're alone. Everyone else, barricade the doors, don't let anything through that ain't us." He turned to Emma, mouth opening as if to give her a job too, but she cut him off.

"I'm going to scavenge the rooms, see if I can find anything to eat, maybe some blankets for the kids." She said shortly, turning on her heel and walking to the end of the hallway.

She could hear whispering behind her but she just went into the first room, a large open space, and started searching through the mess of bodies for anything useful. She didn't look up as footsteps approached- she could tell by the sound that they weren't Walker steps.

"None of us should wander off alone." Rick pointed out, crouching down beside her.

Emma just shrugged. She tugged a blanket out from under a body, and when she saw there wasn't a lot of blood on it, she tossed it to Rick. "It's going to get cold tonight." She said simply.

When she stood up to move to another area, Rick grabbed her arm. "Wait, I wanted to say something." She raised her eyebrows at him expectantly, and he stepped back a bit. "Back at the CDC, you tried to tell me it wasn't safe, and I didn't listen."

"You couldn't have known I was right." Emma pointed out, even though she agreed.

"But you were." Rick said, almost angrily, but Emma could tell it wasn't directed at her. "I was the one who suggested going there in the first place, and my call to stay almost get us all killed. My son…"

Emma sighed. She had wanted to be angry about this with him, but really had. She'd wanted to throw their ten seconds of time between getting out of the building and the explosion in his face.

But damn it all if that didn't feel like kicking sad puppy. His face didn't help that feeling much either.

"You made the best call you could with the information you had." She said grudgingly. She rubbed her arms before sighing. "You'e got to understand, I've gotten used to following my gut because the one time I didn't, the one time I stayed when all my instincts were telling me to get the hell out, I almost got killed. But," She added when Rick started looking even more forlorn, hand on hips and staring at the floor, "I was just doing what was best for me." I didn't have a group, a son, to think about. Just me."

Rick just scoffed, looking towards the door. "The way I'm going, I might not end up having a group either."

"Hey." Emma said sharply. "I'm not saying you shouldn't listen to other peoples' advice once in awhile, but don't ever question your decisions. You can't doubt yourself anymore, not when people are relying on you. They need to believe in something and they believe in you. Stick with your gut for them."

"But what if my gut is wrong?" Rick asked softly.

Emma bit her lip. "Well, that's when you ask for help. Not from everyone, from someone you trust. But if you don't believe in yourself, how can you expect anyone else to?"

Rick didn't get a chance to respond because the others started spilling into the room, having finished the barricade. The children stayed close to their mothers, looking warily at the bodies all over the room. Glenn took in Rick and Emma's stances before walking over and bumping her shoulder, as if asking if she was okay. She smiled slightly back, which seemed to relax him.

"We'll stay here," Rick said, his self-doubt from before nowhere to be heard. Emma was sort of proud. "We've cleared out a couple places we can fortify if we have to. We'll be alright."

Carol scoffed in the corner. "You mean it this time? Or are you lying like all the times before?"

"Hey!" Emma snapped. "There's no need to be a-"

"That's not fair." Lori said, overpowering Emma, though both their glares were equalling scorching. "And it's no help at all."

Rick clenched his jaw before looking back up. He caught Emma's eye- she was still fuming, but the message was clear: "Don't doubt yourself".

Glenn thankfully broke the tension, that adorable kid. "What the hell happened here?"

"What happened everywhere." Andrea said dolefully. "They got overrun." Her voice was so dull and lifeless, Emma was willing to be she was wishing she'd stayed in the CDC. Dale talking her out might not have been the mercy he'd imagined it to be.

Daryl scoffed, making Andrea glare at him. "Something to say?"

"Yeah." He said sarcastically. "How about '_observant_'?"

"Observant?" Andrea said, sarcasm oozing from her mouth. "Big word coming from a guy like you. Three whole syllables."

"Is that really necessary right now?" Emma snapped, but clearly Daryl didn't need her backup.

"Walkers didn't do this." He said, gesturing around at the bodies slumped against the walls and on the floor. "They didn't show up until all of this went down. Somebody attacked this place."

Emma's blood ran cold. She looked around at the bodies again, bile rising in her throat, and she saw it.

"They're all shot in the head, execution style." Daryl said, giving voice to Emma's thoughts. "Y'all are worried about Walkers? I'd be much more worried about the people who came and did all this."

Emma could feel the bile in her throat and felt like she was swaying. She could faintly hear screams in the back of her mind, screams of the dead and dying, those who'd trusted.

She was halfway out the door, desperate to be anywhere else, when she caught Daryl's next comment.

"Get a dictionary and look it up. _'Observant'._"


	13. Chapter 13

**Author's Note/Disclaimer: **First, I am sorry for the confusion tonight- I accidentally uploaded the next chapter from my Criminal Minds fic, That First Step, onto this story instead of this chapter. Here is the actual, REAL update for One Month Healthy! Thank you to both sweet kitty and masquerade04 for pointing out my mistake, and thank you to HaveManners and An Amber Pen for reviewing my last chapter! I'm sorry it's taken awhile to update, but I'm working on it. Finals are about to come though so I can't make any guarantees.

**Chapter Thirteen**

Emma had to get out of that room, she just had to. It was one thing to see bodies that had been gnawed on, that was kind of the norm now. Everyone knew who the enemy was with these things. But gunshots to the head, eyes wide open in surprise, left out for all to see…

She couldn't do this again.

She stood over the railing to the downstairs, breathing heavily, trying not to start heaving. They'd lost most of their food when the CDC had exploded and there was no way of knowing when they'd get more. So whatever was in her stomach now needed to stay there.

Breathe in…breathe out…breathe in…

_We're doing you a favor, bitch._

A heavy hand landed on her shoulder, gripping tightly. Immediately Emma spun around, grabbing the hand and twisting it, eyes wild.

_**Not again.**_

"Woah woah easy!" The owner of the hand exclaimed. "Emma it's okay!" As the red started fading from her vision, Emma realized that the wrist she was grabbing was Rick's. It wasn't Dieter's, Dieter wasn't there.

'He's not here.' Emma reminded herself forcefully. 'He's miles away.' So why was she still afraid?

Rick gingerly made to put his hand on her shoulder again, but Emma jerked way, backing all the way against the railing. "Don't touch me." She hissed. She noticed out of the corner of the eye that Glenn had followed Rick out into the hall and was watching the scene in front of him, eyes wide. She looked back to Rick, pulse slightly slower but eyes still narrow. "Don't touch me." She repeated.

Rick hesitated. "Emma…"

"I'm fine." She snapped. She shoved Rick's hand away and walked quickly down the hall, not stopping to apologize when she bumped into Glenn's shoulder. She gripped the gun on her hip as she raised a window and stepped onto the ledge outside. "I'm going to keep watch." She said shortly before ducking the rest of the way out and slamming the window shut behind her. She sat down on the grating of what she assumed had been a fire escape, leaning her head against the cool metal bars in front of her. As the sun dipped below the horizon, the moans beneath Emma in the courtyard grew louder, drowning out the screams in her mind.

Breathe in…breathe out…breathe in…breathe out…

_**TWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWD**_

Emma wasn't sure how long she was outside before the tentative knock on the window jolted her from her thoughts. The sun had gone completely down, though the summer Georgia heat kept it warm and slightly sticky out. The Walkers that wandered into the yard had slowed slightly, but she could still hear the moaning below. She had still been leaning against the railing, forehead pressed to the cold metal, but she leaned back as the window slowly slid open.

Glenn poked his head out slowly. "Hey…Uh, I've got some dinner, if you'd like?" He seemed hesitant- understandable, considering how snappy she'd been earlier- but also just concerned.

"I'm not hungry." Emma was lying of course, she hadn't eaten since their first night at the CDC. But given that all that was on the plate was beans and saltine crackers, she guessed they didn't have much. She didn't need it as much as the others did.

"Everyone else is eating." Glenn said, nudging the plate a little more towards her, before climbing out onto the ledge next to her. "We need our strength for tomorrow."

Emma highly doubted that a spoonful of beans and a couple of crackers would help with that, but she took the plate anyway. This made Glenn relax a little, but Emma could still feel his gaze on her out of the corner of her eye as she chewed the cracker slowly. After a couple of minutes, she rolled her eyes. "What?"

Glenn started. "Um, I'm sorry, am I…bugging you?"

"You're staring." Emma pointed out. "You have something you want to ask?" When Glenn hesitated, she snorted. "Of everything that could potentially bite your head off around here, I'm not exactly the top nightmare."

Glenn let out a weak chuckle before looking back at her. "You went somewhere, back in that room." Emma didn't pretend to mistake his meaning. "That's why you freaked." He paused. "Where were you?"

Screams echoed in Emma's mind and she closed her eyes. "Before." She whispered. "I was back where I was before."

She finally glanced back in the window, towards the group all huddled around in a circle. They looked tired, scared, hungry. But not nearly enough.

"You guys don't know." She said. "You've seen one monster in this new world, but just one. Walkers, they're on problem. Granted they're a big problem, but just one problem." She gestured back to the inside, back to the bodies. "People like that? They're something else entirely. You see that they don't care- old, young, sick, strong, it makes no difference. If they're not you, you're not safe." She turned to face Glenn, eyes dark and serious. "When Shane tried to kick me out, he was being smart. You can't trust anyone anymore."

"You trusted us." Glenn whispered. "I mean, you're still here."

"And I've already watched several of you die." Emma snapped. "And we all would've been dead if we'd been ten seconds slower."

There was a silence after that as the two of them stared out over the courtyard. The night hid the executed bodies from their eyes, but the heat wasn't helping the smell stay out of their noses.

"I just don't want to watch more people die." Emma said, exhaustion seeping into her voice. "Not like this."

Glenn gazed out over the dark yard, eyes far away. "You know, before I was with this group, I was with a couple other people in Macon. We tried to rescue this girl who'd locked herself in her room. She kept screaming that I was bit, to go away, but I couldn't just leave her there." His mouth twitched up into a rueful smile. "It turned out that she was the one who was bit, and she asked to use our gun. The guy I was with wouldn't give it to her, so she attacked us, took it, and shot herself." He let out a slow breath. "It's really easy to tell ourselves that the only thing to worry about is the Walkers, but you're right. I think we tell ourselves that's all there is to worry about, but there's more than one kind of monster."

Emma felt a little bad after that. She'd been awfully presumptive to think that this group knew nothing about how bad the world really was. Everyone had faced fear and pain and unimaginable loss. She didn't corner the market in any of those things.

"Why didn't the other guy give her the gun?" She asked, voice a little softer, but still curious.

Glenn smiled, clearly remembering this guy from before well. "He said people shouldn't just start giving up." He paused. "He was traveling with his little girl. I hope they're doing okay."

Emma's immediate thought was that this was no longer a safe world for little girls, but one look at Glenn's hopeful face was enough to make her keep her mouth shut. She didn't have to be Debbie Downer all the time.

There was a tap on the window behind them and the two turned to see Daryl poking his head out. "Imma take the next shift." He said gruffly. "Probably gonna leave early tomorrow."

Both Emma and Glenn traded spots with the hunter and headed back in to the large room. Most of the group was asleep now- Emma was glad to see that Carl and Sophia were circled under the blankets she'd found earlier. The only ones who were still awake were Rick, Shane and Lori.

Glenn curled up in a corner with his head on his pack and was asleep almost immediately. Emma smiled a little- her college roommate had always been able to do that, fall asleep at the drop of a pin. She'd always envied that.

She set up her own sleeping place slightly closer to the quietly debating leaders.

"We need to figure out where we're going," Lori was saying. "So we can leave first thing."

"Fort Benning." Shane said, as if that was the obvious choice. He glanced at Rick. "We tried it your way, man. You owe me. We need to try for Fort Benning now."

Emma bristled- the safety of an entire group shouldn't be based on a _debt_, if one even existed at all. But Rick was exchanging glances with Lori and nodding, relinquishing command to his friend.

Emma scoffed before rolling over and closing her eyes. She needed all the sleep she could get now, especially if Fort Benning was as dangerous as she expected it to be.

"I should have listened to you man." Rick said, making Emma grit her teeth. "It would have saved us a lot of grief, Jackie would still be alive…"

"That was her choice." Shane said lowly. "Don't put that on yourself."

But he would. He'd done the same with Jim, Emma knew that. The two men gathered together and began whispering plans, and Emma closed her eyes again. They had 117 miles to go, and who knew how much they'd have to face in those miles.

_**TWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWD**_

The next morning, while Rick disappeared to call his friend on that walkie, the group started weeding out cars. Daryl opted to take his motorcycle, Rick's family, Carol and Sophia piles into a car together and everyone else clambered into the RV. Glenn sat up front with Dale to read the map, but about twenty minutes in and 3 mistaken exits later, Emma plopped herself down in between the two front seats and started reading out to Dale while Glenn pouted. "I thought you were a pizza guy," she's teased him, to which he'd snapped that he had never driven 117 miles on a delivery.

She'd been wrong before- in order to avoid traffic snarls, they'd had to take back roads, which meant even more distance to cover. Twice they'd had to double back and go a different direction because of a pileup or a plane had crashed in the road. Daryl was able to find paths being enough for the RV on his bike, but it still took a lot of maneuvering and time. And more time meant more gas.

This was the longest car trip Emma had ever been on without the radio, and she was slowly losing her mind. Andrea wasn't talking, Shane and T-Dog kept checking their supplies (like focusing that intensely on their ever dwindling number of bullets and food would somehow make more) and cleaning the guns, and Dale kept arguing with Glenn over the map. Eventually she just leaned her head back against Glenn's chair and closed her eyes, beginning to hum the music from Rent.

She'd just gotten to La Vie Boheme when Shane and Andrea started discussing the woman's handgun, a gift meant to protect her and her sister. Emma had never seen Andrea use it, so she assumed that she'd never gotten around to learning.

"Hey Emma, where'd you get your guns? You seem pretty familiar with them," Shane asked.

Emma opened her eyes and hauled the Winchester into her lap. "My dad started taking me out hunting as soon as I was old enough to get a license. This was my high school graduation present." She ran a hand over it lovingly before pulling her handgun out of the makeshift holster attached to her jeans. "I got this one when I moved to Savannah. I still love hunting, but I needed something easier to carry around for protection, especially after my boss started sending me on drug bust stories."

Shane raised his eyebrows, as if impressed, but before he said anything else, Dale spoke up. "Oh geez…aw no…"

Emma glanced up out of the windshield to see that a large semi had overturned in the road, beginning an extremely clustered traffic swore under her breath as Daryl drove back to them.

"You see any way through that mess?" She called to him. Daryl just gave a quick jerk of his head before turning back. The RV followed behind him, slowly moving in between cars, winding down the road like snails.

"Uh…maybe we should just go back." Glenn said hesitantly, glancing at the map. Emmas good up and put a hand on the back of his chair, overlooking the map. They'd only made it about halfway, and their gas supplies weren't great to begin with.

"We can't spare the fuel." Dale pointed out.

Emma glanced back out at the maze of cars. "Would it help if I got out and shut some of these doors?" She asked, only half joking. Most cars looked as though they'd been abandoned in a hurry, doors open and keys in the ignition. Some of the doors were being a little difficult to navigate.

The further in they got, the more damage they saw. There were clothes strewn all over the road, cars were flipped on their sides, and some still contained unmoving bodies. They were driving through a graveyard, and other than Daryl's bike, it was dead silent.

Until two loud pops ripped through the air.


	14. Chapter 14

**Author****'****s Note/Disclaimer: **I am so, so sorry this took so long! I have written up a chapter for a new story and am working on a fourth one, as well as the two I already have going, so I've been in that weird spot between lots of stuff to write and not enough time or ideas to actually write them. However I've discovered reading other fan fiction makes me a little more likely to feel guilty for not working on mine! So, how is everyone else feeling after that season finale? Honestly, I feel a little jipped. Negan was fantastic, as was to be expected from Jeffrey Dean Morgan, but they spent so much of this season building up to him I'm very annoyed we only got like ten minutes of him, and a ton more build-up. Plus now I have to imagine who got killed for months, because I REFUSE to look at any of the spoiler articles popping up. Not to mention Carol's roundabouts are giving me whiplash. But anywho, here's a thank you to An Amber Pen for reviewing my last chapter (and shootouts to sweet kitty and masquerade04, you guys didn't review but you were nice enough to point out when I mixed up my chapters), as well as to everyone who has liked/favorited my story since then. An on we go!

**Chapter Fourteen**

Emma nearly jumped out of her skin, but fear gave way to an exasperated groan as steam started billowing up from under the hood of the RV. "Great." She muttered. "Because that's just what I needed in my day."

All of the cars pulled over as Dale popped the hood of the RV. "Well, I said it. Didn't I say it? A thousand times, dead in the water."

Emma waved her hand in front of her face to blow away some of the steam as she peered into the engine. It all looked like a tangled mess of wires and parts to her, who knew what was wrong with it.

"And now we're stuck in the middle of nowhere with no hope of-" Dale broke off as he looked around at all the broken-down cars. Emma had to smirk a bit. "Okay, that was dumb."

"If you can't find a radiator hose here…" Shane said, smirking as well.

"There's a whole bunch of stuff we could find," Daryl pointed out, already digging through a car.

Emma wandered over to a mini-van whose tires looked half flat. "It looks like most of these people left in a hurry." She said, glancing in an open window. "They could have left food, water, medicine."

"And we can siphon more fuel from these cars," T-Dog threw in. Emma gestured him over, since her car's fuel gauge was relatively full. Already Emma was digging out some Tylenol from the glove compartment.

"This is a graveyard." Lori said, causing everyone to stop. "I don't know how I feel about this."

Emma suck her head back inside the car and pulled out a box of Ritz crackers, still 3/4 of the way full. She tossed it to Carl before turning to Lori. "It's food." She said simply. "Food and water and gas. We can't exactly afford to be picky anymore."

This got everyone spreading out to the cars agin. Lori looked a little affronted, but Carl was happily handing a sleeve of crackers to Sophia, so Emma turned back.

In the second car she found a knapsack, similar to the one she already had, and she shoved the Tylenol in before searching the rest of the car. She managed to find a couple more boxes of crackers, a few sleeves of oatmeal and some batteries. 'I hope someone is finding something a little more substantial," She thought dryly, staring at the boxes before moving on.

She did find a few Gatorade bottles, and in one car she found a nearly full box of ammunition and a medical kit. But her fifth car she found her first body.

There was a bloody wound on its head, so Emma knew it wasn't a Walker. But the way it was slumped against the seat…she could almost have mistaken it for a sleeping person. Maybe there'd been an accident, maybe it had been suicide. Had there been a family? She saw a 'Baby on Board' sticker in the window and swallowed hard. Where was the baby?

She heard Carl and Sophia coming up behind her, so she quickly rummaged. There wasn't really anything, useful, but she did find a copy of Harry Potter in the back seat.

"Hey guys," Emma said, blocking their path to the car. "Not much in there, but here's something to do the rest of the ride." Both kids thanked her and scampered off to the next car.

"Hey Emma!" Glenn called from a couple cars behind. "Can you give me a hand?"

Emma glanced up and saw he was digging around in an engine. "Trust me, you don't want me in there. I'll probably break something." She warned.

"Yeah, I can attest to that." Shane joked from behind Glenn as he tried to bust open the back of another truck. Emma just rolled her eyes.

She heard the sound of a door rolling up before a low whistle. "Hey guys, were we short on water?"

Emma whirled around to see the truck was full of water cases. "Finally, something goes right!" She said, grinning, as Shane popped one open. "Hey, hey! Save that!" She protested, though Glenn just kept laughing.

"Aw, don't be such a worrywart Emma!" She said, still grinning. "It's like being baptized!"

Emma rolled her eyes. "Boys." She muttered. She turned back towards the RV, rummaging through her bag. There was a decent pile, maybe enough to feed everyone-

A hand gripped her arm tightly and she jumped. Rick was dragging her along, eyes wild. "Lori! Down!" He called, half in a whisper. "Everyone under the cars!" She yanked Emma down next to him and then crawled under the nearest car.

"What is it?!" Emma hissed as Rick rolled onto his back. Carl was under the car next to them, Sophia on his other side, their mothers slightly behind them. Rick put a finger to his lips and gestured behind them. Emma tilted her head up and gasped.

A hoard of Walkers, which she could only see from about the knee down, was shuffling their way, moaning and hissing, so packed in amongst the cars that they were stumbling into each other as they moved down the highway. Emma's heart started pounding. She put a hand to her mouth, trying to cover her now heighten breathing, and Rick squeezed her shoulder. His finger was still to his lips, silently telling her to stay calm. Emma nodded and glanced towards the kids. Sophia looked scared out of her wits, and her mother had both hands over her mouth to keep from crying out.

The herd kept moving, stumbling by the cars the group were huddled under. If any one of the Walkers had been crawling or fell over, they would be able to clearly see the meals that were quivering just inches away from them. It was probably only a few minutes, but it felt like hours. Emma closed her eyes, silently praying (to who, she didn't know) that this would all be over soon.

At last the scuffles started to fade and she untended, opening her eyes and letting out a shaky breath.

Too soon.

There was a squeal from her left from her left as two stragglers caught sight of Sophia. Emma and Rick both rolled out from under their car as Sophia scooted away from the Walkers, sliding down a hill off of the highway and running into the woods. The two adults took off, Emma pulling out her handgun as she leapt the guardrail.

As soon as her feet hit the uneven, rocky ground, Emma felt the usual ache travel up her legs. She gritted her teeth and pushed after Rick; it was no time to be limping. Two Walkers were chasing Sophia and who knew how many more there were.

Even half hurting, she and Rick were still faster than Walkers, so they managed to catch up with Sophia, who ran straight to Emma and tried to grab her handgun. "Shoot them, shoot them!"

Rick grabbed her by the shoudlers. "Sophia, we can't! Those Walkers on the road might hear, then there wouldn't be two, there would be hundreds!" He grabbed her up in his arms so he could carry her, before glancing back at Emma. "Are you okay? Cover me?"

Emma nodded, following after him as he ran further into the woods. She glanced behind her once or twice to see the grey shapes behind them moving faster than she would have thought. Since when did these bastards know how to run?!

The little group reached a creek and Emma jumped down so she could take Sophia from Rick, only to stumble on a rock and swear. Rick set Sophia down next to her. "Hey, you okay?"

"I'm good," She said as he hopped down next to the two of them. He raised his eyebrows at her, probably remembering the last time she'd said that. "I am!" She insisted, but he saw that it took her longer to get to the other side of the creek.

Rick carried Sophia to a small hole on the edge of the creek. "Rick!" Emma hissed, training her gun on the woods.

"Sophia, you have to do exactly as I say," Rick said in a hushed whisper. "Hide in there, squeeze in tight, Emma and I will draw them away from you."

"Don't leave me!" Sophia pleaded.

"Listen, listen," Rick said, waving his hand at Emma who was making furious noises at him. "They don't get winded, we do, and Emma's hurting again. We can only take then one on one. This is the best way for us all to survive, okay?"

Emma hissed down at him as Sophia burrowed into the hole. "I can deal with this Rick!"

"Would you stop!" Rick hissed back. "You're hurting and need help, I'm helping us all here!"

Honestly she would have kept arguing, but when she glanced back up, she could see the Walkers starting to turn their way.

"Sophia, if we don't make it back, run to the highway." Rick said hurriedly. "Straight the way we came. Keep the sun on your left shoulder." He backed away and started kicking up the water, calling to the Walkers. "Emma, start going!" He yelled. "Go, go!" 

Emma hesitated before reaching down to pull Rick up first. "You're supposed to help me, remember?" She said, half-joking, half-still-frustrated. They both took off, careful to not go fast enough that the Walkers decided to go back.

A couple yards from where they'd left Sophia, Rick grabbed Emma's arm to stop her. "We can take them now." He said, but really he'd noticed how she'd stumbled and was limping even more. He grabbed a rock and handed it to her, gesturing to a tree. "Get back there, we'll get them."

Emma narrowed his eyes but did hide behind the tree. It was nerve-wracking— the moans getting closer, the scuffling leaves. Eventually the Walkers reached the little clearing and Emma wasn't going to wait anymore. She leapt out from behind her tree and slammed into the Walker nearest her. It immediately went sprawling — she wasn't very heavy, but these things were damn unstable.

She could hear Rick taking car of the other Walker behind her, but she just kept bringing the rock down on her Walker's head. The rock was big enough that it only took a few hits before it split like a ripe watermelon. She was careful to close her eyes at the last moment so that no blond or goop got in her eyes. They couldn't have another infection, not now.

When Rick finished with his Walker, they both stood up and glanced around. The highway wasn't that far off, but they had to back track to find Sophia. As they walked back, the only sound was the crunching leaves and far off sounds of birds. It was almost as if she was out hunting again, as if the world was normal.

"We didn't have to split up." Emma said abruptly.

Rick looked over at her. "Excuse me?"

"I could have handled that Walker and taken care of Sophia." She insisted. "Two of us versus two of them, we didn't have to leave her alone."

"You were hurting." Rick said, narrowing his eyes. "And don't you say you weren't, I saw you limping. You couldn't take on a Walker and protect Sophia like that!" 

"You don't know that!"

"But I was not going to risk it!" Rick hissed, pulling Emma to a stop. "You've given me some good advice Emma, so let me return the favor." Both adults faced each other, glaring with their arms folded.

"You have what you have." Rick said, not harsh, but forceful. "You don't have to be happy about it, but you need to recognize it, and you need to understand that the world is not the same as what it used to be! You can't do what you used to do."

Emma puffed herself up. "So what you're saying is I'm a liability." She snapped.

Rick's eyes bore into hers, and Emma couldn't help but notice how blue they were. She'd always thought that someone needed contacts to have eyes that vibrant, like the guy who played Jim Kirk in the new Star Trek movie.

"You will never hear me say that." Rick said in a low, gravely voice. "You can't think that after all you've done for us. You know I trust you with my family. I just want you to understand yourself, because I don't want anything to happen to you because you won't admit your limitations to yourself."

The intensity in his voice threw Emma off. She didn't understand what he wanted — he wanted to take care of her, it sometimes seemed, but he also knew she could take care of herself. She was so used to one extreme or the other — someone either wanted her dead or to keep her from exerting herself, not trust her to help.

She averted her eyes back to the creek. "Sophia's not here." She said abruptly. "She must have started back towards the highway." She turned on her heel and started back, taking care not to catch Rick's eye again. After a moment she heard his footsteps following her, but neither of them spoke again.

The dull ache was still in the soles of her feet though, and she didn't slow down. She couldn't slow down. She couldn't let herself be weak.

_**TWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWD**_

By the time they reached the highway, the sun was starting to creep its way through the second half of the sky. They would need to find shelter for the night soon.

As Emma and Rick stepped out of the forest, the group all straightened to attention. Rick went to Lori and Carl, Emma followed slowly. She started to make her way to the car, wanting to take her medication before her feet got any worse, when she was stopped by Carol. The woman looked frantic. "Where is Sophia?! Why isn't she with you?!"

Emma's eyes widened. "She's not back?"

"No one's been by here," Glenn said as Carol moaned and leaned against the guardrail.

Emma swore. "We had her hide so we could draw the Walkers off her, she wasn't there when we got back, we had told her how to get back here so we assumed she was already here…"

"You just left my baby alone?" Carol sobbed. "There were two of you, why didn't you stay with her?!"

"Alright everyone, let's calm down." Shane said, putting himself between the two women. "It hasn't been that long, we'll go out and find her before it gets dark."

Emma nodded as Rick, Daryl andGlenn all gathered up their weapons and hopped the guardrail. As Emma followed them, she and Rick locked eyes. His were filled with guilt, because it had been his idea to split up.

Hers were too, because she hadn't argued, and now that little girl was out there, alone, lost, and and hunted.


	15. Chapter 15

**Author's Note/Disclaimer: **I know, I know, I'm super super late! I have no excuses. None. But I keep seeing reminders about how there are two more weeks before the next season starts and what can I say, I've been inspired. Hopefully this season is really good, if you read my last chapter you will remember I was not entirely thrilled with the ending of last season, if only because Negan has been dramatically underused, but hopefully he'll be around for a good long while on this new season. Plus, you know, it'll be really nice to finally know who got beat with Lucille. I know that almost every option is going to break my heart but at least we'll finally know. Thanks to Katarzyna88gb and Paty S for reviewing the last chapter, and if I look forward to people's thoughts on this one!

**Chapter Fifteen**

Still kicking themselves, Rick and Emma led Daryl, Shane and Glenn back to the creek, calling for Sophia in the hope that she was still in the vicinity and just wandered a little off course. However, when they reached the bank, they hadn't heard anything but their own calls.

"Sure this is the spot?" Daryl asked as Rick led them to the tangled weeds Sophia had crouched in. Emma half expected, half prayed for a little blonde head to poke out of the hole, but all was silent.

"We left her right here." Rick said, gesturing to the shallow hole. "Then we drew the Walkers way off in that direction up the creek."

"Without a paddle." Daryl said dryly. "That seems where we've landed."

Emma ran her hands through her hair, trot tin to the end of the creek that she and Rick had climbed out on. "She was gone when we got back here, is there any chance at all that she was back at the highway now and we just missed her?"

The question sounded stupid the minute it came out, but thankfully no one else commented on it.

"I told her to go that way, and keep the sun on her left shoulder," Rick said, pointing back the way they'd come. He and Emma turned to each other, eyes frantic. They'd left the girl alone, and now she was lost in the woods. Emma's stomach was clenched, and not in the usual hungry way.

Daryl marched over to the side Sophia should have climbed out of, where Glenn was standing awkwardly. "Hey, Short Round, why don't you step off to one side? You're mucking up the trail."

Somehow, the redneck's matter-of-fact, slightly insulting voice was almost soothing on Emma's nerves. He was going about this the right way, they had to focus on finding Sophia, not freaking out. She took a few deep breaths and crossed to the side of the creek with Daryl, who was checking the mud for tracks.

"That is assuming she knows her right from her left." Shane muttered as she walked past.

Emma's jaw tightened and she twisted on her heel. "She's 12, Shane!" She snapped. "Not five! Carl is 12 too, does he know HIS right from his left?!"

Shane narrowed his eyes and took a step forward, only to be blocked by Rick. "Shane, she understood me just fine."

"She was tired and scared, man." Shane said, raising his hands to his hips. "She had her a close call with two walkers. Got to wonder how much of what you said stuck."

Emma was getting really irritated with Shane. Sure his point was sound — Sophia had to be terrified and that might have thrown her off course, but Just the way he was saying it so dismissively, it was like he thought she was just gone.

She wasn't gone. Emma wouldn't let her be gone.

"Got prints over here." Daryl said, halting the argument in its tracks. "She did like you said, headed back to the highway. Let's spread out, make our way back, see what we can find."

"She couldn't have gone far," Rick said. He hopped out of the creek behind Daryl and reached down to give Emma a hand up. Rick looked at her carefully, clearly assessing her, but not wanting to mention it to any of the others. She just rolled her eyes and pushed past him to follow Daryl.

"We'll find her," Shane said, slapping Rick's back. "She'll be tuckered out in a bush somewhere safe and sound."

Emma was staring at the ground, looking for prints, when she ran into Daryl's back. The redneck huffed and turned back to face her. "You wanna think about headin' back?" He said scathingly. "We can find the kid from here."

Emma pursed her lips and raised her eyebrows. "Yeah? Is that why you're about to overlook a sudden left veer in the tracks?"

All four men stopped, stared at her for a minute, then looked down at the ground. Of course Daryl was the only one who seemed to see it, so he looked back at her with narrowed eyes. "You're right. She was doing just fine till right here. All she had to do was keep going, but she veered off that way."

Glenn piped up from the back. "Why would she do that?"

"Maybe she saw something that spooked her, made her run off." Shane suggested.

"A Walker?" Glenn asked, glancing around the woods as if a Walker would be standing right there when he turned around. Actually that didn't sound so ridiculous after all.

"I don't see any other tracks," Daryl said before looking pointedly at Emma. "Unless of course the pencil pusher over there sees somethin' I can't."

Emma threw him a sarcastic grin. "I'm sorry, oh mighty hunter. Want me to hold your bow while you pull out your reading glasses?"

Daryl glared at her and opened his mouth before Shane cut in. "So what do we do? All of us press on?"

"No, better you and Glenn go back to the highway." Rick said. "People are gonna start panicking. Let them know we're on her trail doing everything we can. But most of all, keep everybody calm."

"We'll keep 'em busy scavenging cars," Shane said. "Think up a few other chores."

"And maybe Emma should come too," Glenn said. "To keep Carl calm? He likes her."

Now, Carl was a nice kid, and Emma liked him well enough. But the reason Sophia was out here was because Emma had left her alone. She wasn't just about to stop trying to find her for any reason.

"No, Emma can do a lot more good out here." Rick said, catching Emma's "no-he-didn't" look. "She's a good tracker. She can help Daryl out."

"Help _Daryl_?!"

"Help _me_?!"

With two touchy people staring at him, Rick waved his hand. "You two just go, we'll figure it out."

Shane and Glenn exchanged a glance and started walking — quite briskly, actually — in the direction of the highway.

Rick raised his hands before the other two could get another word in. "Now, let's just get started looking for Sophia. You both know how to track, so let's just put that to good use, okay?"

Emma wrinkled her nose and Daryl just snorted before they set off after Sophia's tracks. Emma made sure to cross to the opposite side of the tracks so that she and Daryl were several feet apart. They wandered a little ways in silence for several minutes.

"Where's a city girl learn to track anyway?" Daryl muttered, eyes still glued to the ground.

Emma didn't even spare him a glance. "I grew up right off the White Mountain forests in New Hampshire. As soon as she could legally get me a learner's permit, my dad had me hunting." She couldn't help but send a little smirk his way. "More than half the antlers in our old study were mine."

Daryl snorted. "That's cute. You cry the first time you shot Bambi's mom?"

"You cry the first time you realized the squirrel footprints you were following were actually yours?" Emma retorted.

"All right, all right." Rick said from the back. "Can we please focus? we've walked pretty far and the tracks are gone."

Emma and Daryl scrutinized the left-strewn ground, narrowing i on twigs strewn about and impressions in the moss.

"No…they're faint, but they ain't gone." Daryl said, pointing towards a faint shoe impression. "She came through here."

Emma squatted by rock. "Yeah, I thin she's heading north for some reason." Daryl nodded. At this point neither of them were looking at each other, they were just enveloped in the search.

Rick glanced between the two of them, amused, before looking back at the ground. "how can you even tell? I don't see anything. Dirt, grass."

"You want us to give you a lesson in tracking or you want to find that girl and get our ass off that interstate?" Daryl muttered.

That shut everyone up for a little while. As Daryl and Emma followed the tracks, the group headed deeper and deeper into the woods. The trees became more and more dense, and Emma wandered what could have possibly compelled an already frightened child to run this way. She glanced back at Rick a couple of times. He looked like he was kicking himself, which was just how he felt, but he couldn't look for tracks out here to help, which made him feel worse.

A hissing noise echoed through the air and Daryl threw out an arm to stop Emma and Rick in their tracks. A Walker was stumbling by, maybe separated from the pack from the highway. All three quickly knelt down to avoid being seen. Daryl jerked his head at Rick, nodding towards it. Rick got the message and stealthily snuck around the Walker to the other side of the path, whistling to get the attention of the stumbling bag of bones onto him. The Walker turned its gaze on him and snarled, but before it could stagger more than a few inches towards him, Daryl was able to shoot it in the head with his crossbow.

The three gathered around the still body, staring at it, before Emma cupped her hands over her mouth. "Sophia!" She called, looking around at the trunks and greens that surrounded them. Could this have been the walker that scared Sophia off-track? "Sophia!"

No response.

Daryl yanked his arrow out of the Walker's head before calling for Sophia himself. Rick stare down at the Walker for a moment before pulling out some heavy work gloves from his back pocket. He knelt down and grabbed the Walker's hand.

"What are you doing?" Emma asked, dubiously as Rick stared closely at the decaying hand.

"Checking for skin under the fingernails." Rick said absently, holding the hand up right at eye level. Emma paled at the implication, but both she and Daryl leaned over the body as well.

"It fed recently," Rick said, prying open the mouth and craning his neck. Ema wrinkled her nose, glad Rick had gloves on him. There were very few things anyone could bribe her with to reach in one of those mouths, dead or otherwise. Rick looked up at the two, eyes tight with worry. "There's flesh between its teeth."

"Yeah, what kind of flesh?" Daryl asked dubiously.

The three hunters all exchanged a glance before Rick started getting to his feet. "Only one way to know for sure." He said grimly, pulling out a switchblade and ripping open the Walker's shirt.

Emma grimaced — sure, she hunted, so of course her dad taught her how to skin her kills, but it was definitely her least favorite part.

'But we need to know,' a small voice whispered inside her head.

Before Rick could begin though, Daryl pulled out his own knife. "I'll do it. How many kills you skin and gut in your life?" He glanced at Rick's knife with an unimpressed look on his face. "Anyway, mine's bigger."

Emma couldn't help but roll her eyes at that. "Really? Boys, you're both pretty. Let's have the pissing contest another time, okay?"

Both guys threw an incredulous look her way before turning back to the corpse. Daryl plunged his knife into the stomach, the sound causing Emma to fold her arms and raise a hand to her nose. The sawing noise intermingled with the squishing until the redneck pulled back. "Now comes the bad part." He warned before pulling the skin apart and beginning to pull out the black, congealed guts. The smell intensified and Emma was doing her best to avoid breathing through her nose, but it was so pungent that she could practically taste it and rotting Walker was not something she wanted to taste.

"Oh yeah," Daryl said, digging around in the guts. "Hoss had a big meal, not long ago. I can feel it in there." He was halfway up his forearm in Walker guts before he pulled out a small sack, probably the stomach, and dropped it at Rick's knees. "We have to get in that gut bag."

Rick pulled out his knife. "I've got this."

It didn't seem possible that one little piece of this rotting corpse could smell worse than the rest of it, but this little stomach did. Still, as Rick pulled the slimy pieces apart, Emma knelt down next to him and started scrutinizing the black goo. A shudder came over her as she looked at the stomach contents, realizing that hardly any of it was recognizable, one way or the other. What could they possibly get from this mess of goo?

Daryl, who was picking around with his knife, managed to spear a hunk of something and held it up. A closer look revealed eye sockets and bone. "Gross bastard had himself a woodchuck for lunch.

Emma let out a slow breath. "So this Walker hasn't been near Sophia." She knew this should make her feel good, but honestly it didn't help. She got to her feet, shifting her gun back into her hands, and scoured the ground for Sophia's tracks.

"At least we know." Rick pointed out.

"Least we know." Daryl agreed.

Emma huffed. "I'm sorry, we _know?_ Sure, this Walker wasn't near her. But it's almost dark out and we still haven't found Sophia, and how are we supposed to find her in the dark? There are hundreds of thousands of others out there just like this one and we don't know where she is!" In frustration she kicked the nearest tree to her. Both men stayed silent, though she would have expected Daryl to make some snarky, I'm-a-better-hunter-than-you comment. So Emma just kept kicking the tree, eventually reaching the point where she was probably at risk of breaking her toe. "WE DON'T — KNOW — SHIT!"

She was just so angry, at everything — at the disappearing tracks, at Sophia for running off before she and Rick could get back because they had been coming back, at Rick for talking her into leaving Sophia all on her own and not believing in her ability to take care of herself and a little girl, and at herself for listening to him. She knew better. No…it wasn't Rick's fault. It wasn't Sophia's fault. It wasn't even really her fault, even though it would have felt better to blame herself. It was those damn Walkers in this damn new world.

That thought alone earned the tree an extra hard kick.

A hand landed gently on her shoulder and she turned to meet Rick's eyes. It probably didn't help her case that she was starting to tear up a little bit, but she was going to blame that on the tree-kicking. His face was calm, but his eyes were pained, confused, much like what Emma was sure hers had looked like before they got all red and watery.

"We'll find her, Emma." He said gently.

There was a beat of silence before Daryl spoke up. "We should head back. Won't be able to find any kind of trail before it gets dark, and we might end up ruining whatever tracks there are left." He hoisted his crossbow back over his shoulder and turned back the way they'd come.

Rick tugged on Emma's shoulder gently and she turned away from the tree and the Walker body. "We'll find her." Rick said again, but Emma just shrugged his hand off and stalked after Daryl. It didn't matter in that moment what anyone siad or did — in fifteen minutes or so she would have to face a terrified mother with the news that the child Emma herself had lost was still missing. And she didn't know what to do about it.


	16. Chapter 16

**Author****'****s Note / Disclaimer: **I've actually been very behind on all my Walking Dead this year - I haven't watched an episode since the premiere. Partially because I just can't handle it (*sobbing*) and partially because I don't have a DVR and I have a meeting every Sunday at 7, so I usually miss part of the show anyway. I'm seeing that the ratings are plummeting though, is it really getting bad or are people boycotting over the premiere? I mean, I enjoyed it, for however much it ripped my heart out. I do have the next chapter for this story written, I'm trying to get out a whole bunch of chapters for stories in the next few days before Thanksgiving break is over so that I'm not thinking about it during Finals, but we'll see what happens. Also, that reminds me - Happy Thanksgiving all! I'm thankful for all of you who stick with this story even when it takes me forever to post XD I'm also thankful for Valley of Winds for reviewing the last chapter! I hope you guys enjoy this one, please give me feedback! Every comment makes me better and every happy viewer makes me smile!

**Chapter Sixteen:**

The trio made their way back to the highway in silence, each dreading the reaction they would receive there. As the sun sunk in the sky, throwing a red-gold glow over the leaves and roots, Emma had to acknowledge that it would have been useless to have kept searching for Sophia. She could hardly see the fresh footprints Daryl and Rick were leaving, let alone be able to track the much older and lighter footprints of a lost little girl.

As they came up the hill to the read, Emma's stomach dropped when she saw Carol, Lori and Andrea standing at the guardrail, staring out at them, waiting anxiously. When it become obvious that the three didn't have Sophia, Carol buckled. "You didn't find her?" She moaned, Lori being the only thing holding her up.

"Her trail went cold." Rick said gently. "We'll pick it up again at first light."

"You can't leave my daughter out there on her own, to spend the night in the woods!"

Daryl shifted uncomfortably. "Out in the dark's no good. We'd just be trippin' over ourselves. More people get lost."

Carol was guided to the guardrail to sit, she was shaking so uncontrollably. "But she's 12! She can't be out there on her own, you didn't find anything?!"

Rick tried to soothe her, talking rationally and quickly in what Emma was coming to recognize as his "police voice". "I know this is hard, but I'm asking you not to panic. We know she was out there."

"And we tracked her for awhile." Daryl threw in.

"We just need to get organized." Emma said quietly. She had wrapped her arms around her middle, looking out over the guardrail as if Sophia might still stumble out.

Rick nodded in agreement. "Daryl knows the woods better than anybody, I've asked him to oversee this."

Once Carol's eyes were diverted to Daryl, they widened and she froze. "Is that blood?"

Daryl, Rick and Emma quickly glanced down at his pants, suddenly remembering the walker autopsy they'd performed on the fly.

"We took down a walker." Rick admitted.

"Oh my God." Carol said, breathing heavily and swaying a little in her seat.

"There's no sign that it was anywhere near Sophia!" Rick insisted, staying in Carols' line of sight.

Andrea spoke up, one hand on Carol's back. "How can you be sure of that?"

Rick glanced at the other two, trying to put it into words that wouldn't horrify anyone. Daryl, on the other hand, had no such tact. "We cut the sumbitch open. Made sure."

Lori sat beside Carol on the rail, rubbing her back as Carol still swung her head around, looking for something desperately to hold onto. Her eyes found Rick and, slightly behind him, Emma. "How could you just leave her out there to begin with?" She demanded. "How could you _both _just leave her?!"

Rick and Emma both stiffened, Emma's arms tightening around her middle. This is what she'd been dreading - the guilt. The righteous guilt.

Rick held up a hand, trying to explain. "Those two walkers were on us. We had to draw them off, it was her best chance -"

"It sounds like there wasn't another choice, Carol." Shane said walking up behind them.

Carol turned her gaze specifically to Emma. "No? It took both of you running off to make sure she was safe?" Her voice was getting high and hysterical. "Why couldn't you have stayed with her, gotten her back? What good did you do? Did you even help, or did you and Rick have to leave because you were slowing them down?!"

Emma's face grew paler with every word. She opened her mouth, but no sound came out.

"How was she supposed to find her way back on her own?" Carol cried, starting to hunch over her knees. "She's just a child! She's just a child…"

"It was the only option." Rick said, glancing back at Emma pleadingly as if she would back him up, but she couldn't say anything at all. "It was the only choice we could make." But Emma couldn't agree. She couldn't agree, not with any certainty, and it made her sick to her stomach.

Carol was right. This was her fault. And, judging by the way everyone else was staring at her now, they all agreed.

Shane finally broke the silence. "There ain't anything else we can do tonight. We should all hunker down, try to get a little rest, so we'll be fresh in the morning. Dale and I can take turns keeping watch, make sure that herd doesn't come back through."

Quietly the group began to disperse, Andrea and Lori shepherding Carl and Carol into the RV, T-Dog close behind clutching his arm tightly. Rick turned back to Emma, who hadn't moved a muscle. He tentatively touched her shoulder. "Emma, she's stressed and upset." He said softly. "Don't take all that - "

"She was right." Emma said tonelessly. "You ran off because you were worried about me. You wouldn't have left her otherwise."

"You don't know that." Rick insisted. "That was our best chance for all of us to survive!"

Emma just shrugged his hand off her shoulder and climbed over the guardrail to sit, staring off into the trees. Rick backed away after a minute, eventually getting into his car with Lori for the night.

Emma ignored the quiet scuffling of the camp around her, staring out at the forest, even as the light faded. She vaguely recalled a fact a friend had told her once, that the original determination that night had fallen was once you couldn't tell the difference between a red string and a black one, and wondered if she'd be able to tell the difference between blood and tar at this point. She jumped slightly, shaken from this thought, as a hand landed on her shoulder again and Dale's concerned face appeared next to her. "Emma, shouldn't you be getting inside?"

Emma shrugged. "I actually was thinking about going out myself." She didn't know when she'd decided that, but once she said it, she knew she would be doing it.

Dale's eyes widened. "That's too dangerous, Emma! And you heard Daryl, you could lose the trail, maybe even ruin it on accident."

Emma stood up, walking back to the truck bed where she'd dropped her knapsack. She dug through it and pulled out a flashlight before quickly swallowing an Alleve. Dale hurried up behind her. "Emma you can't possibly…please don't be -"

"Be what, Dale?" She snapped, whirling on him. "Be worried? Be guilty? Sophia is out there alone. I cannot just lay down and go to sleep when she's scared and I could've stopped it." She started fumbling with her pack, pulling out the extra knife she kept for safekeeping, shoved past Dale and slide down the hill into the forest without any further argument.

It was stupid, and Emma knew that. If was too dark and too dangerous to be out looking for a lost girl. But Emma was too wired to do nothing at all, to sit down, let alone sleep. She couldn't stop moving. If she stopped, Sophia would be gone, and nothing Emma could do would call her back.

She couldn't see shit, of course, so she was basically wandering aimlessly. "Sophia?" She called softly, not wanting to spook the girl by sounding like a walker. "Sophia, it's Emma. You can come out, it's safe now."

Stomping footsteps starting crunching up behind her, and Emma grasped her knife handle tightly before spinning on her heel, arm raised to strike. But, of course, it was only Daryl, eyes blazing.

"The hell do you think you're doin', wanderin' around out here?!" He growled, stomping forward to grab her arm. "Ain't we got enough trouble with one missing girl?"

Emma, incensed, ripped her arm from Daryl's grasp. "I'll be fine, go back to camp." She snapped. "I don't need a babysitter."

"Clearly you do if you think this isn't a dumbass idea." Daryl retorted.

A sudden hissing and shuffling to their left caused both to spin around, Daryl raising his crossbow in a split second. A walker, a lone female with long hair and flesh melted on one half of her face, rotted limbs jutting out at awkward angles, stumbled towards them, arms raised and teeth gnashing.

Daryl got the walker in his sights but was shoved aside. "I've got it." Emma said tersely.

"What are you doin'?!"

Emma ignored Daryl's warning hiss and rushed forward, kicking the leg of the walker so it fell forward before shoving it completely to the ground. She pinned it down with her knees, the rotted limbs not giving much push as the walker snapped its teeth at her, and plunged her knife into its skull. Immediately the walker's arms fell limp, the mouth stopped moving, and the hisses faded away to just cricket chirps.

But Emma didn't stop.

She pulled her arm back and stabbed the walker's face two, three, four more times. She kept her mouth shut tightly, jaws locked, mindful of the tainted blood that was getting all over her shirt. Every swish and thud of her knife was overpowered by the sound of Sophia's crying, and all Emma could see was herself, running in the opposite direction, leaving her crouched in a tangle of weeds.

The fifth time she raised her arm a large hand wrapped around her wrist and jerked her backwards off the walker. "That's enough." Daryl said shortly. Her butt hit the dirt only briefly before she was pulled to her feet by her upper arm.

Emma glared at Daryl, who glared right back. "We're gonna find her." He said gruffly. "Ya hear me? We're gonna find that girl. So quit being such a scribbler and get back to the cars before ya muck up your knife."

At the derogatory and yet ridiculously childish insult, Emma couldn't help but let out a snort of laughter. "What are you, five? Pencil pusher was a better insult than that."

Daryl just nudged her roughly. "Yeah yeah. Come on, let's get back. Won't do no good to anybody if you're stumblin' into my back tomorrow."

It only took a few minutes for them to get back to the highway where Dale was waiting, looking relieved that Emma was in tow. She didn't say anything, just crawled into the back of a pickup truck. There were blankets and pillows already laid out, and Emma tried very hard not to think about what could've happened to the people who had expected to use them. She closed her eyes and tried to focus on the crickets, the heat, the night air.

Anything but the pit in her stomach that still wouldn't go away.


	17. Chapter 17

**Author's Note / Disclaimer: **Yes…yes…I know, it's been quite awhile. Way too long. I was trying to write over the break and it just didn't happen. I apologize tenfold for that. I am trying my best to work now that I'm back to school, and I have actually taken down one of my stories to try and revamp it so I won't be bouncing back and forth between as many stories anyway. To be fair though I am working on chapters for other stories that I haven't even posted yet…so please bear with me! I do thank everyone who liked and favorited this story while I was away, and a special thanks to Valley of Winds for reviewing. I'm glad to know that people are still enjoying my work even if I'm not putting it out on a regular basis!

**Chapter Seventeen:**

Emma didn't sleep well. Even though there was someone on watch all night long, every snap of a twig or rustle of the leaves could've been a walker. She shot straight up in the truck bed the first few times it happened, but when she caught Dale looking over at her (probably concerned), she forced herself to stay down. When she finally drifted into an uneasy sleep, she didn't dream - it was just a rush of confusion and fear and screaming. Just before she snapped awake a raspy, familiar voice whispered to her, almost as if it was right n her ear - "Nighty night, walker bait."

Emma jolted up again, shaking, and glanced around. The sun was starting to peak over the trees, casting a rosy glow over the traffic snarl. She shook herself and grabbed her knapsack - there was no point in trying to get back to sleep, and she wanted to change her clothes.

Shane was on top of the RV now, and he nodded to her slightly when she walked past the grill. Emma carefully eased open the RV door and peaked inside. Dale and Glenn were curled up in the two front seats, Andrea and Carol were stretched out on the back couches, and T-Dog was just laying on the floor, snoring away. Carefully Emma stepped around the man and tiptoed her way to the bathroom. She closed the door quietly and stripped off her dirty shirt and pants, both covered in walker blood. 'Maybe these guys had the right idea about laundry,' she thought wryly to herself. She'd either have to find new clothes or soak these, because she was running out of clean-ish options.

She tugged on a comfortable pair of jeans and a loose blue top before turning to the sink and splashing her face with water out of her water bottle. Looking at herself in the mirror, she had to admit she looked awful - her eyes were bloodshot and had huge bags under them, and her mouth was pulled tightly into a line.

"We're going to find her." She whispered to herself. "We are going to find her."

With that in mind, she shook her head and exited the bathroom and the RV as the other inhabitants started to stir. Rick, Shane and Daryl were huddled in a group outside the RV, pouring over a map Daryl must've pulled out of the map bin. Rick glanced up and gestured for Emma to come over.

"Hey, we're figuring out the game plan," He said, pointing to the creek on the map. "The creek is going to be Sophia's only landmark, so it's likely that she'll stick around it, that way she sort of knows where she is."

Daryl hadn't glanced at Emma once. "This is where we left off yesterday," He said, pointing out a curve in the map. "If we head down one side, come back up the other, we might pick up something in the tracks."

Emma nodded slowly. "Sounds like a plan." Some of the others were starting to trickle out of the RV yawning and stretching, so Emma assumed the group would be heading out soon. She walked back to the truck bed to pull out her rifle and check it quickly before they set off. As she was reloading, Rick walked towards her slowly.

"Can I talk to you for a second?" He said lowly, glancing back over his shoulder at the group. Emma sighed before nodding, slinging her gun across her back.

The two walked a little ways into the traffic snarl, though not out of Dale's eyeshot from the RV top. Rick had his hands on his hips, glancing over the tree-line. "Shane and I decided to keep the guns under watch, at lest until everyone is taught to use them."

Emma raised her eyebrows. "Are you saying you want me to hand over my gun?"

"Nah, you know how to use yours. Just don't want some of the more inexperienced members carrying them until we get them trained." He stopped, still staring out at the forest. "Daryl said you went out on your own last night."

Emma scoffed. "You know, I didn't make him for a tattletale."

Rick turned back on her, eyes hard. "What were you thinking, Emma? Going out at night by yourself?"

"I know it was stupid." Emma said, mirroring Rick's stance. "I was upset and frustrated and just wasn't thinking straight. I just wanted to be doing something."

Rick folded his arms. "Daryl also said that you took on a walker, just with a knife."

"Daryl sure was talkative."

"Do you realize how dangerous that was?"

"God Rick, stop talking to me like I'm five!" Emma snapped. "I know it was stupid, alright? I was just frustrated and wanted to find Sophia, and I couldn't just lay down and sleep while she was God knows where out there. Sorry if that's an issue for you, but it doesn't really matter because you can't tell me what to do."

Rick put his head down for a moment before looking back up to meet Emma's eyes. "Look, I know this hasn't been easy on you." He said, taking a step closer and lowering his voice. "You and I were both out in that forest with her, you know I'm just as frustrated as you. But we are going to find her, you know that. And we can't afford anyone else getting lost or hurt, especially not someone who is vital to the group."

Emma snorted. "Please, I'm not more vital than anyone else. If anything I'm now your greatest hinderance."

"You know you're not a hinderance." Rick said sharply. "I realize that you haven't been a member of our group for very long, and you're not used to being part of one either, but you know that you're not a hinderance. I don't know why you keep putting yourself down like that."

Emma didn't look at him after that. She knew why she was doing it, but it had been a long time since anyone had told her she was anything less than a hinderance. After what she'd been through in Crawford, it was hard to think of herself as anyone else.

Rick glanced down at her feet, which didn't help Emma's frayed nerves. "Are you feeling-"

"I'm fine." She said, the sentences slightly clipped. She got irritated at the question most of the time anyway, but she was tired of snapping at Rick, frankly. She just wanted to get out to find the girl.

"I'm fine. Let's just go look for Sophia."

_**TWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWD**_

When Emma and Rick got back to the RV, the group was gathered up as Shane handed out some of the weapons they'd found the day before that wouldn't cause noise, that could be swung or stabbed instead of shot. Rick jumped right in with him.

"Everyone's going to take a weapon," Rick said, walking up to the trunk where Shane was already standing. "Try to pick one that isn't too heavy, you need to be able to swing it easily."

"These aren't the kind of weapons we need." Andrea said, one hand on her hip as she stared at the pipe Shane was trying to hand her distastefully. "What about the guns?"

"We've been over that." Shane said pointedly from his spot against the RV. "Daryl, Rick, Emma and I are carrying, that's it. We can't have people popping off rounds every time a tree rustles."

"I'm not worried about the trees." Andrea retorted.

"Guns make noise." Emma threw in, handing a long hunting knife to Glenn, who took it gingerly like he thought it was going to bite him. "If someone were to shoot their gun at the wrong moment, any walker between one and three miles away could hear it and start heading our way. Whether or not you have gun experience, it's better to use other weapons anyway. The people who know how to use the guns will know better when it's necessary to shoot and when it's better to be silent."

Shane and Rick both nodded at her words, but Andrea was glaring at her. "That's easy for you to say when you're the one holding the gun."

Emma narrowed her eyes. "These things are attracted to noise. If you want to get that herd from yesterday back down here, then it's all over for everyone. You don't have a gun? Tough. Someone will teach you when we're not out searching for a lost girl." Glenn had put down the knife and was toying with a hook thing. Emma swatted his hand. "That's a stupid weapon, take the knife."

"The idea is to take the creek up about five miles, turn back around and come back the other side." Daryl said offhandedly, as if he hadn't listened to the argument at all. "Chances are she'll stick by the creek, since it's her only landmark."

Rick started pacing in front of the group. Back in his police uniform, he looked calm and controlled. But Emma could see in his eyes that he was barely holding it together. "Stay quiet, stay sharp. Keep space between you but always stay in sight of each other." He walked over to Dale, sitting on the edge of the RV door steps. "Dale, keep on these repairs. We've got to get this RV ready to move when we get back. Can't stay in this snarl too long."

"We won't stay a minute longer than we have to." Dale swore, getting up and wiping his hands. "I'll find anything else we need form these cars. Just…good luck. Bring Sophia back." He glanced over Rick's shoulder at Emma who was showing Glenn carefully how to swing the knife for maximum impact. "Not only for Carol and Sophia, you know?"

Rick nodded. "I know." He reached out to hug Carl to his side. "Keep an eye on Carl while we're gone."

Carl looked at his father incredulously. "I'm coming with you." Rick stared back at him, and Emma, glancing up from Glenn's practice swings, had to smirk a little at how similar the two faced looked. "You need people, right? To cover as much ground as possible?"

Rick and Lori both looked at each other, with Dale, Emma and Shane al watching in interest.

Lori shook her head. "It's your call. I can't always be the bad guy."

Rick pursed his lips before glancing up, catching Emma's eye. She raised her eyebrows and shrugged slightly.

"He does have all of you to look after him." Dale said thoughtfully. "I'd say he's in good hands."

Carl nodded eagerly and looked up at his father. Rick shook his head a couple of times before groaning. "Okay. Okay. But always within our sight, no exceptions." He ruffled Carl's hair before walking to Shane. Carl turned to Dale, who gave him a slight wink, before looking at Emma.

"Do you think I can carry one of those?" He asked, pointing at the knives.

Emma laughed. "No offense Carl, but I don't even trust Glenn with these right now."

"Hey!" Glenn said, affronted, but Emma just slapped his wrist again.

"Put that thing down, I feel like you're going to take off a finger." She scolded. "That's it, I'm getting you a bat." She shoved Glenn playfully, even though he was pouting, and was about to walk back to the RV when she realized that Andrea and Dale were in the middle of a heated discussion.

"I know you're angry at me, you made that much clear," Dale was saying a little urgently. "But if I hadn't done what I did, you'd be dead right now."

"Jenner gave us an option, I chose to stay." Andrea said coldly.

"You chose suicide!"

"So what's that to you? You barely know me."

"I know that Amy's death devastated you-"

Emma winced. That was definitely the wrong way to go.

"Keep her out of this." Andrea snapped. "This is not about Amy, this is about us. And if I decided I had nothing left to live for, who the hell are you to tell me otherwise?"

Andrea's voice was getting louder, and everyone in the group was starting to notice. They were all trying not to hear, though, looking anywhere but the RV and shuffling around awkwardly. Emma carefully stepped back a few paces, pushing Carl back towards his mother and giving a pointed look at Glenn.

"I saved your life." Dale said weakly.

Andrea scoffed. "No, Dale, I saved yours. You forced that on me. I didn't want your blood on my hands and that is the only reason I left that building. What, did you expected I'd have some epiphany, some life-affirming catharsis?"

Dale looked completely shaken. "Maybe just a little gratitude."

Well, he definitely wasn't going to get that, Emma could tell. And she didn't know if he deserved it. Emma would never choose to die, to just give up - that just wasn't in her to do. She'd faced too many people telling her that she should. But Andrea was a different person, and as Emma had told Jenner back in that lab, no one had the right to decide the story of someone else's life. Vaguely she remembered what Glenn had told her about the woman in Atlanta who'd been bitten and the man who'd refused to give her the gun to end her life. Would Emma had handed over the gun?

She wasn't sure she knew the answer to that.

As Andrea walked away, the rest of the group started following her to the forest. Dale stood in the doorway of the RV, staring after the, and Emma ducked her head before rapping Glenn on the shoulder. "Come on, let's get going."

"But what about the bat?"

"Just don't swing the damn knife around like a yo-yo!"

_**TWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWD**_

The group filed through the woods, Rick and Daryl in the lead with Shane holding up the back. Emma placed herself between Lori and Carl and Glenn, figuring she could make up for the three of them if it came down to a fight.

Carl was admiring the small knife his father had handed to him just before they'd left. Honestly it was a little toothpick, Emma didn't see how it would do any good against the walkers, but she supposed as long as Carl didn't hurt himself it would be fine. Eagerly Carl turned back to Shane.

"Shane look!" Dad said I could carry it as long as I-"

"Keep it down." Shane said harshly. "We're looking for Sophia. You need to focus on that."

Carl's face fell and he sped up slightly, falling into step beside his mother, who was glancing around anxiously through the trees.

Emma shot a look at Shane. She understood him being focused on Sophia, but the way he'd treated Carl made it seem like more on that. Carl was an older kid, but not so old that he could be treated like an adult. That was probably frustrating, and for Shane to be putting him down like that, he must have doubted everything he felt.

Lori had turned around to murmur something to Shane - hopefully chastising him a little bit - so Emma reached back to squeeze Carl's shoulder slightly, smiling a little to reassure him.

As the group rounded the corner Daryl ducked down slightly and whistled for everyone to be quiet. There was a rounded tent up ahead, surrounded by the remnants of a campfire and trash. Emma's heart started beating faster. Could Sophia have thought refuge in there?

"She could be in there," Shane murmured, echoing Emma's thoughts as the entire group crouched down for a better look.

"There could be a whole bunch of things in there." Daryl muttered, sneaking forward to the tent. Carol tried to follow him but Rick held up a hand asking her to wait as he followed behind Daryl. Shane followed as well; Emma stayed back (since she was the only other person with a gun). Daryl pulled out his knife and tried peeking into the tent, but it was zipped up tightly.

Rick turned back. "Carol, Emma." Both women crept forward slightly. Rick gestured for Emma to back up Daryl on the other side of the tent flap and she nodded, crouching with her gun pointed at the entrance.

"Call out softly." Rick whispered to Carol, almost like he was just letting out a breath. "If she's in there, yours is the first voice she should hear."

Emma was suddenly more grateful than she'd ever been that Rick was a police officer. Sure, Shane was one too, but there was a marked difference between them, Emma had seen that right away. Shane was a soldier - rigid, unyielding, no shades of grey, only survival. Rick was truly there to serve and protect, he was the officer, the one to whom others mattered above all else.

She was reminded why she'd decided to follow him in the first place.

"Sophia, sweetie, are you in there?" Carol called, her voice shaking. "Sophia it's Mommy. We're all here, baby."

There was no movement from inside the tent. Daryl and Emma glanced at each other and nodded; Emma slowly cocked her gun and Daryl reached for the zipper.

When Daryl pulled the flap back, the stench of death hit them full in the face. Emma actually started gagging - the heat had certainly had its way with whatever was in there. Daryl put a hand to his nose and climbed inside, letting the flap fall shut behind him. A minute or two passed before he climbed out again, holding a tiny gun in his hands. "It ain't her." He said gruffly.

Carol visibly deflated, turning away from the tent into Lori's arms. Emma lowered her weapon and straightened up, glancing back at the covered hole. "What is in there?" She asked hesitantly.

Daryl shrugged. "Some guy. Did what Jenner said - opted out."

Almost immediately Emma glanced towards Andrea, who had gone a little pale. Emma poked the hole.

"Want to see what your choice looks like?" She said quietly. "Because odds are you're not going to have access to another bomb."


End file.
